December 31

We'd planned to go to DC today, and that's just what we did. We departed grandma's house at about 10, and were parked and ready to explore by 11. I took many (many) photos so this is just a representative collage:

It was chilly but not really cold, and the sun played peek-a-boo through the clouds all day long, creating beautiful shades and shapes that were best experienced in person (but still, fortunately, translated reasonably well through the lens of my phone camera). We walked a good 10 miles as we traversed the National Mall, stopping by the Jefferson Memorial, the Vietnam and Korean War Memorials, the FDR Memorial, the MLK Jr. Memorial, The World War II Memorial, The National Monument, and the Lincoln Memorial. (Phew.) Adam bought the kids National Park passports at the first gift shop of the day, and they (well, Isaac and Brady anyway) were enthused about the idea of visiting as many places as possible to earn as many stamps as possible. (Total stroke of genius, I have to say.)

After a late lunch break at McDonalds and a stop by my Mother Ship (couldn't let me stars expire, after all!), we walked over to the Capitol building, where we posed for a pic front of the huge Christmas tree and a conversation between me and a pair of Capitol Police Officers netted the boys some Capitol Police stickers. (To explain: Brady was wearing his Ravens beanie, and when one of the officers commented on it, I noted that his fandom was particularly impressive since he's from California. That prompted said-officer to offer up said stickers along with a big thank you for supporting DC-area sports teams. Sometimes it's good to be a chatty cathy.) The Capitol itself had, regrettably, closed early since it's New Years Eve, so we continued back toward the Smithsonian.

There are many, many museums to choose from, but we opted to check out the National Gallery of Art. I'd been Facebooking check-ins periodically throughout the day, but was surprised when my old friend Elizabeth --from the junior high days-- messaged me to say she was nearby. So she met up with us in the museum and I was happy to have a quick and unexpected face-to-face with her before we called it a day.

Then it was Chipotle for dinner and at the moment, it's New Years Rockin' Eve on TV (though we'll see how much more of it I can take).

It was a great day. The kids all had fun, Adam and I had fun, and it was good for me to remember traversing some of those same paths during my own childhood. So tonight, I'm thankful for a good day. And although 2019 hasn't been my favorite year of all, I'm thankful for the moments during the past 365 days that made me smile, and I'm also thankful for the ones --even the ones that were hard-- that helped me to grow because I always, always want to be a better person.

Blessings to you and your family as we enter 2020. May it be a year that brings you much joy and many opportunities to grow closer to God and to those you love.

December 30

It was a nice, quiet Monday. After a slow morning, we headed out and stopped at Roy Rogers for lunch.

From there, we went to my mom's house to help with some around-the-house tasks. While Adam hung wind chimes, the boys unwrapped furniture and we hauled it to the basement.

Afterward, we took a ride to Clarksburg. It's become something of a habit for me to take a gander at my old house while I'm here and to absorb the mixed nostalgic feelings the experience evokes, so that's what we did. A thick fog had settled over the earth by then, so we hit the road bound for grandma's. After a pizza dinner, we got to work on a "history of Maryland" puzzle I borrowed from mom's house, and that brings me to the Right Now.

Slow days filled with familiar but not oft experienced sights and sounds are blessings. It is, after all, good to remember our roots now and again.

December 29

It poured down rain most of today (and thankfully it was in the 40s and 50s, otherwise it would've meant a lot of snow). Also fortunately, we had only one plan in place: brunch with dad in Frederick. So we all --us and dad plus Bobby, Charlie, Reaya, Brendan, and Brianna-- convened at Madrones at 11. They couldn't accommodate our relatively large party at a single table so I had to do piecemeal photos.

Anyway, we dined on a variety of tasty dishes, from my rather yummy but huge coconut cream cheese french toast to the little boys' chicken fingers, and chit-chatted.

After a few restful hours back at grandma's house, we took a quick trip into town to get ice cream at Baskin Robbins. Though the dismal weather made it an odd activity choice, the reason for the outing was a good one: a celebration of Abby's third straight high school semester of straight As.

As of now, we're in grandma's casual dining nook, watching the 49ers play the Seahawks for division dominance.

So yes, it was a much-needed quiet day. And a good day. And I am thankful.

December 28

I'm a go-go-go'er when it comes to vacationing and I love (love) seeing people, but I admit that even I am a bit tired right now!

That said, today was another good day. After a gradual kind of morning (which is my favorite kind of all), we headed to Columbia, where I left the rest of the family at the movies so they could take in the new Star Wars flick while I went to a junior high get-together with six other fabulous ladies -- the same group I met up with two years ago when we were last in Maryland. (In the pic, R to L: me, Eileen, Shay, Jen, Jenn, Iris, and Wendy. And Lizzie the dog front and center. :D)

There was much laughter and wine and cheese while we talked about what we've been up to and what once was. The meet-up was, to boil it down to the most simplistic term, really, really fun. And definitely entertaining. (And I'm excited to see them again in two years.)

From there, we drove to my brother's house, where we dined on spaghetti and meatballs and talked and watched my niece walk around with a spoon stuck to her nose and engaged some of the short people in a floss dance battle.

And now, I'm back in grandma's family room, thinking back on the hours and once again feeling grateful to be here and having a good time remembering and living and making new memories that I'll be able to look back on and smile at in the years to come.

December 27

Today began in delightfully lazy fashion, as I got up at 9 and enjoyed my cup of coffee while I completed a puzzle we began earlier this week on the dining room table. A little later, I got the chance to catch up over lunch at Quincy's in Damascus with my old friend Donna, who I went to school with back in the fourth and fifth grades (and hadn't seen in person in 30ish years).

After a few hours of quiet(ish) time back at grandma's, we were off again, this time to drop the kids off with their cousins so the adults could go out. Adam drove us --me, Bobby, Reaya, and Charlie-- to the (is the indefinite article required here?) Idiom Brewery in Frederick, where we joined my cousin Jerry and his wife Steph for conversation, beer (yes, I had a little, which reminded me that I'm really a wine and mixed drink girl and not a beer girl), and Jenga. Although Bobby inadvertently dumped a beer in his lap, Jerry emerged victorious in our Jenga tournament, tying me for the title with three knockdowns. (That's how it works, right? You're supposed to knock them over.) From there, we visited a food truck for some BBQ, and found a table at another brewery so we could eat (and so some members of the party could have more beer).

I'll save the precise content, but the drive home was one of the funniest trips I've had in a long, long time. I laughed so hard at times that I could hardly breathe. So for that breath-baiting laughter and the time with friends and family I don't see often, I'm thankful.

December 26

Today, we took the two-hour drive to the Eastern Shore to visit my Aunt Barbara and Uncle Frank. We hadn't crossed the Chesapeake Bay Bridge in 10 years --and Brady had never been at all-- so I figured it was high time we returned to Caroline County.

We arrived around 1PM and sat in the enclosed porch and chatted for a while, and then Uncle Frank took Adam and the kiddos on a tour of the farm while Aunt Barbara and I sipped some coffee. There was also cat-chasing (with limited success, but Brady tried really, really hard, even going to far as to splay himself out on the barn floor while sweetly called out to them as they crunched their kitty kibble), a lovely sunset, and an even lovelier lasagna dinner (or, if you were Brady, a lovelier orange and applesauce and rolls dinner).

In what was perhaps the day's most fish-out-of-water moment for Abby, Isaac, and Brady, my cousin Tom's 16-year old son Gage came by was was cajoled into giving my trio a ride in what was literally a big green tractor. (If you look closely at the picture, you can see all four of them in the cab. Also please forgive the extremely cheesy Jason Aldean reference.)

It's always a blessing to reconnect with family and friends, so it was a good day. And I am grateful.

December 25

So, choosing a photo to represent a Maryland Christmas is a virtual impossibility for me for numerous reasons. For one, we run all over the place so a single image can't possibly represent the entire day. For another, I routinely take something like 200 pictures so whittling it down to one is... yeah, impossible. So instead of making myself crazy(/ier) I try to cobble together a representative collage that more or less tells the story. And here is the 2019 attempt:

This year's story began at grandma's house, where we opened presents and dined on cinnamon rolls. We packed up and headed over to Bobby and Reaya's house at 11 and spent time hanging out with them and the kids and my brother Charlie, who arrived yesterday evening. After my mom and Harvey arrived, we all enjoyed a yummy brunch put together by Reaya before opening a first batch of presents and then hitting the road --again-- to see dad's side of the family at dad and Lisa's new house. After more eating and chit-chatting with aunts and uncles and cousins (and dad and Lisa, of course), we turned around and went back to Bobby's, where we finished opening presents and then, at long last, returned to grandma's for the night.

Busy? Definitely. Insanely busy? Perhaps. But it gives us a chance to connect --if only briefly-- with relatives we rarely see, so it's worth the day of insanity. So for that craziness and for the blessing of having people to visit while we're here and particularly for that baby born so long ago who made this day one of celebration, I'm so, so grateful.

December 24

Today is, of course, Christmas Eve. I joined the conscious world at any embarrassingly late hour, and after I'd downed most of the coffee Adam had ready for me, we opted to go for attempt number two at fulfilling Abby's wish for Jerry's cheesesteak. This time, we were blessedly successful so we were able to check a must-do item off our while-in-Maryland list.

Grandma had asked Adam if he and the boys would rake the leaves in the backyard at some point, so when we got back to the house, we all headed out to tackle the task. (Which, let me tell you, was no joke because my grandma's yard is enormous. Legitimately enormous.) The kiddos all enjoyed loading up the golf cart with bags of leaves and driving them to the woods, where they (the leaves, not the kids) were reunited with their nature-y friends. There was no small amount of terror involved for me sitting in the cart with them as they took turns driving, but practice fortunately led to increased competence, so by the time we had to push it back to the garage to re-charge the battery, they were all much-improved operators.

Following some afternoon down-time --which was reading for some, puzzle-building for some, gift organization for some (see Abby and the little tree), and walking around the circle out front for some-- we sat down to a meatloaf dinner prepared by my hunny.

And now, as the 9 o'clock hour approaches, the stockings are out by the fireplace with a cookie, carrot, and glass of milk nearby, and Isaac and Brady are tucked into bed. Santa will likely come by soon, and then... Christmas.

As always, I approach Christmas with a sense of gratitude for that baby born so long ago and all that His time on earth meant for us. It's not always an easy life, but it's always a blessed one, and I am thankful.

December 23

Full Maryland day number dos began with Dunkin Donuts and nectar from the mother ship (both courtesy of my hunny) and continued with the last (really last, I hope) shopping outing of the season. Then we engaged in a failed attempt to grant Abby's request for Jerry's cheesesteak, but alas, they seem to close more often than a kid with a cold uses tissues, so we wound up at Five Guys instead, where we watched aghast as Brady wolfed down a double cheeseburger and a tub of fries. (And then said he was still hungry. He may wind up being seven feet tall.)

From there, we headed back to grandma's house. Abby spent some time reading while the rest of us went outside. It was a reasonably temperate 50-degree day and the boys had a major case of the wiggles, so we watched them whack each other the wrapping paper rolls (and then joined in. Well, I joined in until Brady smacked my finger so hard that I thought for a few minutes that he'd cracked it. He has some sauce). Then we decorated the little Christmas tree, made some chocolate chip cookies, and went out to see the Holiday Lights at Seneca Creek State Park, which we'd never done before. It was packed with cars, but I think we all enjoyed seeing the displays (and I enjoyed sticking my head through the sunroof and breathing in the chilly night air. There was some really refreshing about that. (Plus I'm pretty sure it was the first time I'd ever popped out of a sunroof so there was a shot of novelty there.)

Right now, Isaac and Brady are in bed and the rest of us are in the family room watching choirs perform lovely Christmas classics on TV. It's peaceful. It's pleasant. And I am thankful for the entire day.

December 22

It was a full first day back in Maryland. We headed out at about 10, dropped by my mother ship for some liquid energy, and then took the divide and conquer approach to finishing (or at least trying to finish) our Christmas shopping. We lunched at IHOP and then dropped by my mom's house where we picked up the little Christmas tree we use while we're here (which just so happens to be the little tree that was mine when I was little) and helped mom set up one of her own in the family room.

From there, we dropped off our purchases at grandma's house before we headed out again to my brother Bobby's house. We hung out and chatted with him, my sister-in-law Reaya, my nephew Brendan (who, like Abby, is 15), and my niece Brianna (who, like Isaac, is 11) for a while before making a corporate decision to go to dinner at the Hornet's Nest.

I don't know if it was the really, really tasty glass of sweet white wine or the string of silly text messages we exchanged with my brother Charlie (who is still in Los Angeles until Christmas Eve) or the company in general or being back in a really familiar place that holds long-held memories for me, but I loved dinner. We laughed and talked and had a grand time together. So for all of today --and for dinner in particular-- I'm so grateful.

December 21

We got up at zero dark thirty this morning to catch a 5:45 AM flight to Baltimore. And now, at 8:28 local time (which is 5:28 our usual time but feels more like 11:28), I'm sitting in my grandmother's family room in a chair that was my late grandfather's favorite spot to perch. I'm watching grandma as she sits in her usual chair across the room. She's writing something in a journal and half-watching a talk show I've never seen. It kinda sorta feels like it felt back when I lived here 30 years ago and kinda sorta doesn't. But it's all good, because this is a thing this Christmas season:

I was thinking about it on the plane and I can say one thing with a great deal of certainty: there are many ways that my life has not gone as I thought it would go. I never thought I'd live so far from family and come back for extended visits only once every few years. I never thought I'd still be figuring out why I tick like I do in my 40s. And of course, I never thought one of my babies would go Home before me and force me to adjust to a new normal that I never, ever wanted.

But this picture --taken after we'd all dined on slices of frozen-food-section lasagna and conversation for dinner-- reminds me of an important truth. Some things --like my kids-- change over time. They get bigger and smarter and more sophisticated. Other things --like my grandma's sense of humor and this house we're staying in right now-- are consistently familiar (at least for a time). And both elements of life --the ever-changing and the sigh-inducing familiar-- can and so often do co-exist, working together to usher us onward in our respective journeys.

So tonight, I'm thankful for my current reality and for the reality of my past, because every bit of awkwardness and familiarity and confusion and success that I've experienced over the years made me who I am.

(And P.S. -- Logan is in this picture. He's the baby in my lap in the photo on the wall above my head. How about that. :) )

December 20

Between school and cleaning and packing, it was a busy Friday. But even though it was a hectic day, I took some time this evening to hang out with Nikki because some holiday Starbucks beverages and pedicures were very much in order.

I don't always do a great job of it, but I try to take time with people who are important to me, and she certainly makes the cut. We had a good time chatting and enjoying our frou four drinks from the mother ship and our hot stone massages. And we both headed home with fabulously seasonal toes: green sparkles for her, red sparkles for me.

Good friends are a true blessing, and I am thankful that she's a fixture in my life.

December 19

Abby had her last dance class of 2019 this evening, and as is always the case during the holiday season, the group performed a little routine. The end pose featured Abby and Gracie making a heart with their arms:

And, as it happens, it was Gracie's idea.

I love that they threw such a visible symbol of love into the dance. Love is, after all, the most important and most valuable "thing" in this world.

December 18

I don't feel like God jumps around and waves His arms at me to get my attention all that often, but I definitely notice when He does. And I definitely noticed those waving arms more than once today. The first instance gave rise to this rather lame representative image from this morning. (It's lame because the idea of asking a total stranger if I could take a picture of her felt creeper-esque.)

Anyhow, I was sitting in my customary spot at Starbucks just surfing the internet when I overheard a woman at the next table giving what amounted to be her personal faith testimony to her companion. I tried not to listen, but she was impassioned enough that it was hard to tune it out, so I continued to tune in and out until she got to a particularly salient bit when she talked about sticking with people and loving them through hard times, even when the very human parts of you are tempted to give up. And drawing the strength and wherewithal to do those things from God. It struck a chord with me in a big way, so I got up, went over to her, gave her a hug, and said thank you and Amen, sister. It could've been awkward, but when the spirit moves you, you move.

Later in the day, I spied a little printed note card on the coffee table in our family room that I'd not noticed before. It talked about how to help friends who are going through painful, difficult times and encouraged us to love and support one another by being present and willing to listen.

Without going into details, it was a double-shot of confirmation that I'm on the right track. And for that reassurance, I'm so grateful.

December 17

We were a little early to basketball practice this evening, so I joined Brady, Isaac, and one of Brady's teammates for a little two-on-two action. (And it was no easy feat given that I was wearing jeans and boots.) Anyway, after a few more boys had arrived and I realized my woefully out-of-shape lungs were burning, I sat down and watched the boys do their thing.

Isaac is an awesome baseball player but has very little experience with basketball, so it was fun to see him engaging with --and encouraging-- the younger boys. And then after he took a seat next to me on the bleachers, it was fun to watch him as he watched his little brother. There's nothing quite like brotherly love.

December 16

I stopped by a Starbucks I don't usually go to this morning (verging on coffee betrayal, I know). As I waited for my peppermint mocha to appear on the bar, I saw this by the window:

I glanced at the notes on top and then scribbled one of my own, which I tucked into the center of the pile. Then I reached in without looking and pulled one out, hoping for something profound. But alas, its message was a plain-Jane "happy holidays". After a ho-hum moment, I smiled at the realization that it's always nice to pass good wishes on to someone else, regardless of how plain-Jane those wishes may be. So for that little bit of seasonal cheer, I'm thankful.

December 15

It was a very busy, very good day that began with the boys singing in church and ended with late dinner with Kathy, who came to town on business. The mid-section of the day featured our annual Christmas get-together with Adam's immediate family. Here we are in this year's edition of the annual photo:

With a trio of little ones in the mix, it was something of a rapid-fire event as the hours passed, but it was still sweet to eat together and to sit and watch the cousins play together harmoniously and to watch as presents were opened and laughs were shared.

Change is a given in this life of ours, so chances to reconnect with dear friends and with family are always blessings to me.

December 14

Brady turned nine years old today. I think he had a good birthday; he opened it with a morning basketball game that saw his team win by the amazing final score of 7-5. (Yep. 7-5. And Brady had five of those points, including four from a pair of fast breaks and a single free throw.)

Then he opted for lunch at Applebees before scooting off to baseball tryouts in the afternoon. He finished his day --as always-- with presents and cake at home before heading off to bed.

This kid of mine, this number four of four... it amazes me to realize that he's already nine. To say that the years since he joined our family have flown by would be a gross understatement, but he's brought well-over a decade's worth of blessings to our lives. He's quick-witted and sassy and funny and smart and friendly and kind. (And, as you can see by the Ravens beanie, he's my Baltimore sports fan buddy.) And though he has a decidedly competitive edge, he's also sensitive and sweet. And on this very last single-digit birthday of my long mommy career, I am thankful.

December 13

There were things about today that I found decidedly frustrating, but at least it started off on a good note when I met Sherrie for coffee.

We sat for a few hours, just chit-chatting as she intermittently handled work-related activities. And I was reminded, for the umpteenth time, that I really enjoy spending time with friends. So for both the time and the shot of self-awareness, I'm grateful.

December 12

It may be nearly Christmas, but it's still rather fall-ish here. I experienced that fall-ish'ness firsthand this afternoon when I drove through this lovely scene of reds and oranges and yellows.

And it reminded me of a truth. Change isn't always fun and we may not always want it, but it can certainly be a lovely thing in the end.

December 11

I've said this more than once, but this girl of mine absolutely cracks me up sometimes.

We were heading out to the car this evening so I could take her to Youth Group when she paused under the icicle lights along the side of the house and opened her mouth. I just looked at her for a moment before I realized what she was doing --waiting for imaginary drops of water to fall-- and fumbled for my phone to take a pic of the strangeness.

She's sometimes of a weird one at times, but I love her. And I'm thankful for the doses of levity she brings to my life each day.

December 10

I was coming down the stairs to watch a movie (Daddy's Home 2, for the record; close enough to a holiday flick for us) with Adam and Abby a few minutes ago. I paused on the landing to look down at the Christmas tree, and the sight made me smile.

There's something so cozy and relaxing about Christmas lights. It's almost as if they emanate a sense of calm that only exists at Christmas time. So yep, I breathed in the atmosphere for a few moments and then continued on with my evening. It's not always easy to find moments of respite so for this one, I'm thankful.

December 9

I was sitting in my usual spot at Starbucks this morning when one of my favorite baristas --Dez-- came up to me holding a plate. On that plate was this piece of lemon loaf cake.

She handed it to me and explained that she'd opened it but no one was going to buy it, so she thought she'd give it to me as a little treat. I really like lemon loaf cake (and I really, really like the icing on the cake!), so I was tickled pink (or maybe yellow would be the more appropriate color choice here).

I'd been feeling a bit sluggish following a night of really poor sleep, so her kind gesture was a big blessing.

December 8

Tonight we engaged in one of our annual holiday traditions, but with a twist: we drove around looking at the Christmas lights in town (the tradition) and Adam's parents joined us (the twist). Here we all are at our final stop:

Since we can't really fit seven people in either of our cars, his parents drove along behind us, and the kids rotated --one at a time-- between us and them. It was a relatively clear evening and not terribly chilly, so we had a good time checking out the displays --some of which are pretty darn spectacular-- and listening to Christmas music.

So tonight, I'm grateful for that oh-so-often overlooked blessing of togetherness. (And I'm also grateful that there was no bickering because let me tell ya... that's a small miracle.)

December 7

Brady had his first basketball game as a Hawkeye this morning. That's him doing the tip off for his team (which, by the by, did indeed yield possession of the ball).

He was a bit tentative last season, but this morning he was an entirely different kid on the court. He landed four buckets, passed well (and impressively hard! You could tell he plays baseball by the way he hurled the ball around), and had a few assists. And on defense, he had a few steals and was all about being in the other team's faces. Better still, every time one of his teammates made a good play or scored, he offered up a hand of congratulations in response. In the end, the final score was a solid 27-7 in favor of the Hawkeyes.

He loves to play, and I love to watch him do things he loves. That's a big win-win for me.

December 6

It's hard to believe that Valerie held her first cookie party back in 2015, but yes, it's actually been that long since she first hosted a group of us moms on a Friday evening to eat, laugh, chit-chat, and exchange cookies.

Tonight's gathering was, as they always are, filled with lots of amazing appetizers, hot chocolate, cider, and plenty of good cheer. Since our kids are a bit older now and some of us have moved on to different schools, we don't all see one another particularly often, so this gathering always gives me a chance to shoot the breeze and share some laughs with old friends. And for that not-small blessing, I'm grateful.

December 5

I had to bake cookies for tomorrow evening, and was none too pleased to realize --when I started to bake said-cookies tonight-- that we were out of eggs. So I summoned my usual shopping partner and we headed over to Safeway.

She followed me around the store sharing her usual witticisms, and then got into the physical comedy act by loading up on cans of her favorite chicken noodle soup. My girl cracks me up, and I am grateful for her wit.

December 4

As I drove from pick-up number one to pick-ups number two and three this afternoon, Brady chirped from his perch on the back seat that the radio volume was low. When I turned it up, he immediately recognized the tune from church and began to sing along: Bless the Lord o my soul, o my soul.......

The sound of his sweet little eight-year old voice enthusiastically singing those words made my heart swell with happiness. I am far, far from a perfect Christian, but I'm thankful that the seeds of faith have been planted in him and in all of our kids in spite of my weaknesses and failings.

December 3

Long, long ago, Adam sewed a giant tomato Christmas ornament. And every year, that big red blob makes its way to a prominent spot on his parents' Christmas tree. After watching Adam hang said ornament on Sunday, Abby thought it would be fun to make her own tomato for our tree... so she did. And today it assumed its place of honor:

I could roll my eyes at it because I've always thought the big red tomato was ridiculous, but I won't. Instead, I'll just be amused that my daughter created a new (albeit bizarre) tradition for our family. And since I like traditions, I'll go ahead and call the strangeness a blessing.

December 2

When I came downstairs early this evening, Isaac and Brady were on the couch half watching the Monday Night Football game and half playing with their respective devices. So I grabbed a blanket and plunked down between them for some cuddle time.

I listened to Brady tell me all about the game he was playing (and when I say "all about" I mean "ALL ABOUT" because like I've said before, he's a talker after my own heart) and indulged Isaac's need to demonstrate how loudly he can make liquid in his stomach swish back and forth. But even better, I was just with them, in the moment. And given how quickly times flies by, that's a very good thing.

December 1

And into December we go.

We opened this final month of 2019 by helping Adam's parents decorate their Christmas tree this morning.

After I hung an ornament, I settled into a spot on the couch to simply observe as three generations of Wights joined forces to get the job done. The final result was a wee bit bottom heavy thanks to the contributions of our not-quite two-year old niece, who cautiously selected and hung every bell she could find on the bottom-most branches, but it was beautiful nonetheless. And for that loveliness, I'm grateful.

November 30

It rained most of today, but that didn't stop us from heading over to a local shopping center to take a horse drawn carriage ride with Santa this afternoon.

Before the ride, an elf and what looked like the tooth fairy (though I'll give her some latitude and call her another elf) made the kiddos some balloon animals (cats and dogs, because as Abby quipped, it was raining cats and dogs). And then we boarded the carriage for our whirl around the parking lot. It's a short ride and, all in all, a very small thing, but it's something the kids enjoy and it's fun for me to sit back and watch them enjoy themselves.

November 29

It was a very typical Black Friday at our house. Abby and I got up at 8ish and headed out to engage in our traditional spate of retail therapy, which began with a stop at my mother ship and continued through Walmart, Ulta, Old Navy, JC Penney, Hobby Lobby, Target, and finally the Cheesesteak Shop for lunch.

After an abbreviated naptime at home, the five of us plus Lambie piled into the truck to pick out our Christmas tree. Outlet mall traffic made for a very (very) long ride and it rained as we trolled the trees at the lot, but in the end, we drove off with a nice evergreen strapped to the roof.

Given that tradition is comforting to me, today was comprised of a lovely string of blessings. And I am grateful.

November 28

It's funny: to me, it doesn't feel like it's late enough in the year to be Thanksgiving, yet somehow, it is. We began our day with football and bread-baking, and then Adam and I took a brisk walk around the neighborhood before we all got dressed for dinner and left for his parents' house at 2:15.

There was turkey and stuffing, salad and bread --four types, courtesy of my bread-master husband--, mashed potatoes and pie. There were kids running around like tiny madmen and adults who hadn't seen one another in 'oh gosh, has it really been so long?' catching up on life. And a blessing that remembered Logan and Adam's Granddad, who are both gone from the physical world but very much alive in our memories.

It was, to put it simply, a nice day. A pleasant day. A mostly quiet day. A day without tears, which seven years ago --as I struggled to simply breathe through our first Thanksgiving without our Sunshine-- I considered an impossibility. And for all of that I'm thankful.

November 27

So, Abby made a deal with Adam a few months ago: if she successfully completed a BearBear-inspired video cover of the "Cheers" theme song, he would take BearBear out to lunch. (Yes, you read that right and no, there was no alcohol involved in the writing of this post.) She followed through with her end of the bargain, so today, while the boys were at baseball camp, Adam held up his end by taking me, Abby, and BearBear to Applebees.

Adam sat with BearBear and posed and re-posed him several times over as the meal progressed. It wasn't particularly busy so it wasn't hard to notice the server giving him the side-eye as she periodically passed by the table.

As strange as it was, I'm thankful that Adam kept his promise to our daughter, because keeping our word to one another is important, and far too many people, well, they just plain don't bother doing it.

November 26

The rainy season at long-last debuted this evening, and it did so in impressive fashion.

After I finished talking with my mom, I sat on the floor in my bedroom and just listened to the sound of rain pelting the roof.

So today, given the high fire danger we face during the summer and early fall, I'm grateful for the moisture that will bring renewal to the earth.

November 25

We'd always planned to come home from the cabin today, and the threat of a big snowstorm bearing down on the mountains solidified that decision (in my mind, at least. The younger folks among us --especially a certain 11-year old-- begged to stay for the big event, but I really wasn't down with the idea of dealing with upwards of four feet of snow so we vetoed that idea).

Before we headed out, Adam and I took one more walk around the neighborhood and Brady decided to join us. It was chilly at about 40 degrees and the wind sliced through my too-thin denim jacket and two shirts, but the skies were clear and quite lovely.

I'm not really a big "out in nature" person, but it was a pleasant stroll with two of my favorites, and that kind of thing is always a blessing.

November 24

We had a nice, quiet day at the cabin. (Well, quiet except for the boys periodically running around like banshees, but that's par for the course.) There were football games watched and Jr Jeopardy games played and a walk taken around the neighborhood. And then this evening, there was dinner down the mountain at the Snowshoe Brewery.

It was a chilly'ish 40something degrees outside and not super warm inside the restaurant, so when I noticed Brady shivering in his chair, I had him come and sit with me. And as we sat together, it occurred to me that he's almost nine years old and that the past decade has flown by. So I pulled him close and cuddled him, because I know the days of him wanting to sit in his mom's lap are limited. So for the blessing of that time and for the awareness that I should soak in every moment of his sweet eight-year old'ness while I still can, I'm thankful.

November 23

We headed up to the mountains this afternoon for a quick weekend getaway. I looked outside at one point while I rested on the couch and saw Adam and Isaac sitting together on the deck:

I don't know what they were talking about, but it was a tender moment and I wanted to remember it. Adam's job and commute don't leave him with much time at home, so it's always a blessing to see him enjoying downtime with the kids.

November 22

Thanks to a teacher in-service, today was a rare mom-and-Brady day. After we dropped the older kids at school, he and I went to Starbucks (in our pajamas) for hot chocolate and a snowman cake pop (him) and coffee (duh. That would be for me).

We chit-chatted and then headed over to Safeway, where we trolled the aisles and loaded up on --per his request-- cheese and yogurt. We hit a few more stores and then headed home for a while, where I watched him play video games for an hour, and then it was off to pick up lunch at In N Out. Then just a little later, the bell rang at the middle and high schools and we retrieved the big kids.

I'd say it was a quiet day, but it definitely wasn't quiet because Brady is a talker. But it was a very nice day. So for the time with my littlest, I'm grateful.

November 21

One of the kids' favorite activities of late is shooting tiny, sticky rubber chickens at the ceiling and watching to see which one falls first. (Seriously. This is just a pic of one, but as I type, there are two hanging above my head.)

It's definitely weird, but it's also funny to watch the flinging and the odd competitiveness that brews as they wait to see whose bird is first to take the big dive to the carpet below. And sometimes, I'm thankful for just that brand of frivolity.

November 20

Since it's conference week (and I won't talk about the disaster that drop-off is for a parent with kids at all three levels of school on late-start day during this particular week but oh-my-gee-NO), I get extra time with Brady, since the elementary schools operate on a minimum (half) day schedule. So today, we walked home, he did his homework, and then we went to Walgreens so I could pick up a prescription. And then we used up the last few minutes before middle and high school pick-ups by poking around in the Hallmark next door.

Brady is absolutely a talker, so it was fun to follow him around and listen as he commented on anything and everything he saw. Some comments reinforced preferences I already knew (like his affinity for Minions, video games, and Mickey Mouse) while others were more enlightening (like his unlikely fascination with glass Christmas ornaments. When I asked him why, he said he liked how the light shined through the colors. Go figure). And one comment made my heart melt. We were standing next to a display of Alex and Ani bracelets. He watched intently as I looked at what was available, and finally looked up and me and said "tell me which ones you like. I'll remember."

I loved the sweet sentiment behind that remark and I love the sweetness of my kids.

November 19

Brady's parent/teacher conference was this afternoon. The report was an excellent one, so I said sure when he asked if he could play at the park for a few minutes before we headed home.

I watched him play Skill --or at least I think that's what they call it-- and just smiled. A lovely afternoon, a good report... good things. And given how much not-good there can be in this broken world, I'm thankful for every morsel of good I get.

November 18

This is a terrible photo of my lunch, but I inexplicably forgot to take one in-the-moment so this will have to do.

Nikki and I took a spur-of-the-moment lunch trip to Taco Bell this afternoon. Dani girl was sleeping in the backseat, so we hit up the drive-thru and parked in front of her house to chow on our nacho boxes and chat.

It was really, really good girl time and I really, really needed it. So tonight, I'm thankful for her and for that time.

November 17

I love it when my kids surprise me in the best ways possible, and this evening it was apparently Abby's turn to do so.

Over the course of a stunningly cheerful 20 minutes, she jumped out of her seat and jetted to the kitchen when Brady asked for help getting more food from the crockpot, congratulated Isaac and gave him a celebratory fistbump when he shared that he'd raised his math grade to an A, and then randomly started dancing with said 11-year old in the kitchen.

I have no clue what spurred the outpouring of exuberant kindness, but it made me smile. And for that gift, I'm grateful.

November 16

After a lackluster night of sleep, I awoke on the proverbial wrong side of the bed. I was unable to collect my thoughts in a coherent way so the mood persisted on and off throughout the day until this evening, when I saw this on Facebook.

I clicked to read a sermon recently delivered by an old friend and was surprised to find that he'd referenced Logan at its end. He too knows the pain of losing a child, so I wasn't at all bothered by the mention. And in fact, although I ugly-cried as I read it, I was heartened by the truth of his words: that we're all alive to God -- even those who are no longer here with us on earth. Even his Mack. Even Logan.

So although the sting of moving forward without him physically present still rips and tears at my heart and I still have days and weeks when I feel like I just can't keep walking, it's so, so good to be reminded --again-- that the pains of this human life are temporary.

November 15

I was walking up a side path to the elementary school to pick up Brady this afternoon when I came upon a small patch of these flowers. Their dainty, sun-seeking faces were so cute that I had to stop and admire them for a second. And then, because I'm me, I thought I saw something significant in the moment and had to take a picture.

I didn't know how I'd use the image or what I'd say about it at the time, but a thought eventually came to me. Sometimes, like in the case of this little sweetie, it's easy to find beauty in the form of crisp petals, symmetry, and a perfectly shaded, buttery center. It's easy to appreciate something like this --or love it, even-- because it's so pretty on the outside. But it's a bit harder to appreciate the flowers that have faded or lost petals underneath the sun's oft-harsh, intense rays; the ones that don't look quite so sweet. But that doesn't mean that they're not attention-worthy, and in fact, it's likely that they need even more care than the ones that look so perfect.

I could go on indefinitely with my flowery analogy, but we all know I'm talking about people. It's easy to be kind to those who are consistently beautiful to us because we know we'll get the kindness we think we deserve in return. It's much harder to show that same love to those who aren't always so lovely; to those who are sharp or inconsistent or, at times, even unkind. Given that I've been that person --that person who's distant and difficult and stubborn-- I know how important it is to show grace to those people, too.

Because in God's eyes, no one is unlovable. And a little bit of grace shown can plant a seed that will one day grow into a healthy plant that produces even more stunningly beautiful flowers.

November 14

Adam messaged me this afternoon to see if I wanted go out to dinner. So after some schedule-wrangling, we did just that:

I was just going to take a plain old pic of us, but he suggested we include our frou-frou drinks --a non-alcoholic fruit smoothie for him, a strawberry lemon drop for me-- so here we are while we waited for our food.

He's busy these days. The kids are busy with school and activities and I'm busy driving them to and from said destinations. So it's always a blessing when he and I can carve out some time to just catch up and sit together in a booth at a restaurant.

November 13

I went through today's phone photos just now and as it happens, I look hideous in all of them. So I will go ahead and embrace the awfulness right now:

I took this while sitting at a red light this evening. I was driving Abby to youth group, and a worship song that we both know had come on the radio. So we both started singing.

I'm not much of a singer. (Of the two of us, she's the far more gifted one in that area.) But it was nice to have that moment with my girl.

November 12

Brady asked if he could get out of the car and blow bubbles during the middle/high school pick-up today, and I said sure. So that's what he did. And I just watched him from my perch in the driver's seat.

And while I did, I had a really obvious thought: Super sweet are the precious few years we get to enjoy before the weight of the world --and the pains of human life-- weigh upon our hearts. So seeing my littlest boy enjoying the sunshine and the bubbles was just... well, sweet.