August 12

Brady's sophomore year of high school starts tomorrow, so he and I flew back to the Bay today. Abby stayed behind for a few more days to hang out with her friend Kam, and Adam stayed to help Isaac with move-in day, which is also tomorrow. It's a little bit of a forehead-slapper that the same thing happened four years ago --Abby moved into Wheaton on the boys' first day of school-- but it is what it is! I'm thankful that Adam could stay and be with Isaac as he begins dorm life and I'm looking forward to hearing both of their perspectives on the experience.

Anyway, we all got up very early and piled into the rental car for the drive to Midway. I thought it was sweet that Abby and Isaac came along, given that we were up pretty late last night thanks to the White Sox game. (And given that Isaac was apparently up very, very late writing notes to Brady and me. I read mine on the plane. It was wonderful and perfect and it brought tears to my eyes. He may not always enjoy writing, but he does it well when he wants to do it well. But I am, as I so often do, going off on a tangent.)

I sat mostly quietly and listened to what transpired in the backseat. I listened as the typically bravado-driven BearBear escaped from Brady's bag and asked Isaac for a hug. I listened as they laughed together and carried on their usual brand of crazy conversation that, as a Gen Xer, I only kinda-sorta understood. But confusion aside, I am grateful that I was able to bear witness to those precious interactions.

When we got to the terminal and pulled into the departures area, everyone got out of the car to hug us "see ya later." I was particularly touched when Abby, who seemed to be fighting back emotion, asked for a quick group hug. So we all came together, embraced for a few moments, and said our I love yous. And then Brady and I were off. It was the perfect way to part ways and I'm glad my girl felt compelled to ask for it.

And now, well, now I'm just plain tired. It's that combo platter of getting up early and travel and emotion that makes it unusually difficult to be eloquent. But I'm home, and I'm deeply grateful to God for the time I had with my guys on the train trip and then with all of us in Illinois. I already miss Isaac, but I know that he's walking with the Lord and I know that He will direct my sweet guy's steps. And for those truths, I am eternally thankful.

August 11

Brady and I fly back to California tomorrow, so today was our sole full day here in Illinois. And it was indeed quite full.

It began brighter and earlier than intended when the hotel fire alarm began blaring at 7 AM. Just as we were heading out the door, it went silent. So I went back to sleep, and awoke again at a little before 10. Brady asked if I would go down to the pool with him so I did, and I watched him for a few minutes until an unfamiliar alarm on my phone went off: a severe storm warning. And then a little later, another alarm announced a tornado warning and instructions to take cover. I told Brady that he needed to get out of the pool (since it's basically surrounded on all sides by big glass windows) and snagged Abby from the fitness center next door where she was jogging on a treadmill. Long story shorter, we wound up sitting in the basement ballroom of the hotel while the storm (apparently; although I saw some lightning and definitely heard thunder, I didn't see the telltale green sky nor the torrential rain and tree-bending gusts of wind that followed) raged outside. 

Once the danger passed, we went to Giordano's for lunch, and then on to Costco (which happened to be just across the street) for some necessities to get Isaac started. Then we swung by Wheaton so Isaac could pick up his books from the bookstore and Abby could retrieve her sweatshirt, which she left at Ashley's apartment last night. After a Sonic drink run, we enjoyed a short hour of downtime before heading off to the White Sox / Reds game at Rate Field. Although the Sox lost in extras after holding a lead for much of the game, it was still a fun experience. There were plenty of passionate fans in attendance and we sat in the nosebleeds where the beer flowed like water, but it was fun to be in a new-to-us stadium, just a few sections away from the bare-chested, t-shirt waving throng of men that regularly encouraged new participants to join them, disparaged Green Bay, and booed the many failed attempts at the upper deck wave. (They've been a Thing at MLB stadiums all season. I have no idea why.) It was also Pope Hat Night, so we each walked away with a Pope-style hat in honor of Chicago's own Pope Leo. (Seriously.)

Since it went into extras, the game went a little later than we'd anticipated, and the traffic getting out of the lot was pretty terrible. But on the plus side, as we wound our way down to ground level from the upper deck, we got a pretty spectacular view of the illuminated Chicago skyline. 

The food lines at the game were insanely long and all we managed to snag were some nachos, so on the way back to the hotel, we stopped at Cane's for chicken. And now, well, now I should be trying to sleep because Brady and I have an early flight, but I wanted to try to jot down some thoughts first. It's hard to believe that we're here; that tomorrow I'll be leaving my sweet Isaac for his first semester of college. I did finally give him the prayer shawl and he gave me a big hug. I'll miss him. But I know he'll do well. And I know that God will continue to direct his path. So for all of that, I am endlessly thankful.

August 10

We made it to Chicago! But I don't want to get too far ahead of myself.

Our conscious day began as the train rolled into Omaha, Nebraska. It was something of a surprise to Adam and me, as we were theoretically supposed to cover the entirety of Nebraska overnight, but since we were running a few hours behind schedule, we got to touch pavement in the Cornhusker state (for about 30 seconds) during a mega-quick fresh air break after all.

After breakfast (which was a very filling quesadilla for me), we went to the Observation car, where the guys tried to teach me the new card game Isaac found yesterday via an AI search. My muddled morning brain couldn't wrap itself around the concept, but hey, at least I tried, right?

We crossed into Iowa and spent much of the day looking out at near-endless acres of corn growing on gently rolling hills. Honestly, I hadn't previously realized that Iowa was anything but flat, so it was a pleasant surprise to see all of that lush greenery rippling along the surface of the land. We had the chance to touch the ground during a brief stop in Ottumwa, where I noticed that an Amish family we'd been riding with disembarked. (Which prompted me to Google "Amish settlements in Iowa". I learned that yes, there are several. I had no idea.)

After lunch --our last meal on the Zephyr-- the four of us mostly settled into our room for the duration of the ride. Our last fresh air break was in Galesburg, Illinois, which we quickly discovered is way out there in the middle of nowhere. (So it's a good thing I noticed that our original reservation had mistakenly sent us there instead of on to Chicago and we were able to correct the goof. Finding a rental car in Galesburg would've been... challenging.)

Anyway, after we arrived and disembarked at Chicago's Union Station, we went inside. While Adam went to get the rental car from Hertz a few blocks away, Isaac, Brady, and I retrieved our checked bags and made our way to the heart of the building. And I was stunned by its beauty. Seriously, with its high ceilings, plentiful natural light, and intricate architectural details, I could've sat there and admired it for hours. (And I totally agreed with Isaac when he said it reminded him of the buildings in DC.)

And then it was on to Wheaton, where Abby was waiting for us in our hotel lobby. Isaac selected Culver's for dinner, and I ate too many cheese curds and other Culver-y yummies. And now we're back in our hotel rooms. Adam is sleeping, Isaac is next door watching something on his phone, and Abby and Brady are down in the fitness room-slash-pool. 

And me? I'm writing and reflecting. School starts Thursday for Brady, so he and I will fly back home in about 36 hours. Although it was a three-day train ride, it feels like it was a whirlwind experience. And I know that the next day will fly by at warp speed. But I'm thankful for the time with my guys and for the new memories we've made. And I'm thankful for tomorrow, too, even before it begins, because each day is a blessing from God.

August 9

I've learned a few things over the past few days. One, it's utterly exhausting to ride a train cross-country. I'm accustomed to getting my steps in each day so the limited opportunities to move around are a challenge. But two, it's really fun to ride a train cross-country. So the second thought is the one I'll carry forward.

Last night as I was lying in bed typing and fruitlessly trying to post to this blog, we were approaching the thriving metropolis of Elko, Nevada. It was pitch black out so I couldn't see much, and eventually, I fell asleep. And courtesy of a pair of smooshy earplugs I bought a few months back, I slept pretty darn well. I found that the bumps were minimal and the rolling sensation wasn't nearly as disruptive as I'd worried it would be. So that was a plus.

When I woke up, we were somewhere in eastern Utah. (My understanding is that we didn't miss all that much while we were conked out.) Brady was already up so we roused Isaac from his slumber at 7 and headed to the dining car for breakfast. Fortunately, it seemed like lots of folks weren't interested in eating, so we received our identical plates of Amtrak Signature French toast in record time. As we ate, we rode through some rather lovely topography in the aptly named Ruby Canyon, so we were able to leave Utah feeling like the entire state wasn't just incredibly dull. (Sorry to the Utah peeps!) 

We enjoyed a few fresh air stops throughout the rest of the day, including one in Green River, Utah, and then several in Colorado as we rode alongside the Colorado River, including Grand Junction, Glenwood Springs, Granby, Fraser-Winter Park, and most recently, Denver. After lunch as the first few stops, Adam and Isaac took naps and Brady hung out in the boys' room while I went to the observation car solo. Although it was hot as blazes in there (an a/c issue unfortunately), I got some pretty spectacular views of the Colorado River and the towering valley above between Glenwood Springs and Gypsum. It was rather overcast, but the natural beauty was just mesmerizing. 

For the remainder of the day, we spent time playing cards in the observation car and hung out in our room (which was admittedly a tight fit but it was still fun) watching the scenery and just enjoying one another's company. Adam helped out by sharing Googled information about some of our stops, including the utterly bizarre Granby Bulldozer Rampage of 2004. We braved the 6.2 mile Moffat Tunnel and took some silly pictures in the dark using a function on my game phone that I didn't previously know about. And I finished working on a shawl I'd been making and entertained the notion of giving it to Isaac to keep whenever he needs a hug from his mama at school. I had him throw it around his shoulders and he wore it until we got up to go to dinner; I wanted to tell him to keep it and why I wanted him to keep it, but my eyes welled up with tears every time I thought about it. I'll try again before I fly home.

We finished the day with dinner and then an extended fresh air break in Denver. We had no idea that the Rockies' stadium was literally right next to the train station, so it was pretty cool to get to see it in person (even if the Rockies are really, really bad).

I probably left out a lot of details I could've included, but the main points are that we had another good day hanging out together, and I'm grateful for the time I've had doing something new with my boys. So for that, I am very grateful.

August 8

As I write, I'm sitting on the bottom bunk in a sleeper car room aboard the California Zephyr. We're about halfway across Nevada and although it's only 9 PM Pacific time, the dark sky and the intermittent, not-so-distant wail of the train whistle makes it feel considerably later. We're on our way to Chicago. The first chapter of Isaac's college experience is being written as I type.

We arose early and Adam secured Mickey D's breakfast for us (per Isaac's request) as my sweet boy finished packing. Then we loaded into the Explorer bound for the Martinez Amtrak station, where Adam's parents met us so they could return the car to our driveway. (Big thanks to them for the assist.)

We boarded the train and the adventure formally began. There were some snafus, the most significant being that our pre-booked adjoining rooms wound up being in different sleeper cars, but the boys seemed okay with being on their own (especially when they realized they'd wound up with a bigger room). 

Throughout the day, we enjoyed lunch and dinner in the dining car. The patty melt and the Angus burger both proved to be winning afternoon picks, while all four of us appreciated the very rich chocolate spoon cake presented for dessert after dinner. We also visited the observation car on multiple occasions (since not surprisingly, there didn't seem to be a lot of folks interested in taking a long look at much of Nevada's scenery and the tables were a great place to play cards). We got off during the "smoke break stop" at Reno and walked up and down the platform. (It was hot. Very hot.) We messaged with Abby who is already in Wheaton hanging out with some of her besties for a few days. I crocheted and chatted with Adam and he even looked up the deets on the prison we spotted in nowheresville. And we watched the scenery go by and realized just how big and majestic this country really is. 

It was, I think, a good day. The photos don't really do the experience justice; I took a lot and Adam took a lot but the internet connection isn't great so it's really just a loosely representative collage that I threw together using Google. 

I'm not entirely sure that I'm going to be able to sleep much, but I'm grateful for the bed (even if it uses up every square inch of floor space) and I'm grateful that Adam took the upper bunk and that there's a harness up there to keep him from falling out, because once I got over the shock of it I'd probably laugh and that would be uncool. And I'm grateful that we're able to be present for Isaac as this next phase of his life begins.

August 7

"My head feels like it's workin' overtime on nothing."

That's what Isaac said after dinner, and I don't think I've ever related to a statement quite like I relate to this one. 

It was his response when I reminded him --for the sixth or seventh time (had to -- he loves that 6/7 thing)-- that he still needed to pack because we leave in the morning for Wheaton. It was, I think, his way of saying that he felt overwhelmed and needed a bit more time to process the looming reality. So he asked to play a few hands of cards first, and then we went and got ice cream at The Dairy (where Tyler, his long-time good friend, took our order), and then he played catch with Brady in the yard, and then Adam and I took Abby to the airport while he figured out which video games to take to school. (She's flying out to spend a few days with her friends; the rest of us are taking the train. It'll be an experience!) And now, now that it's almost midnight, he's munching his way through a Totino's pizza while slowly packing up his things. Processing reality in his own way, in his own time.

And I guess I'm doing the same: processing reality in my own way, in my own time. I haven't really let myself be sad about him leaving, but today the chinks in my armor widened and I cried more than once. I know he'll do wonderfully well at college; he's a people-person and college is an amazing place for people-people. And I know that God holds him in the palm of His hand and will continue to do so. But as the one who carried him for nine months and watched him grow from a chunky baby into a wide-eyed toddler and then on to a conscientious kid and a responsible, caring, sweet teen and now young adult, it's hard to watch him take those steps away from me.

Still, I'm grateful to be his mom. And I'm grateful to know that God has great things in store for him.

August 6

We're down to the last few days before Isaac goes to Wheaton. He has a list but still needs to pack up his things, which makes me a wee bit nervous, but I appreciate how he's approaching his departure by prioritizing time with his friends and family.

Like today, for example, he had his friends over one more time to play video games this afternoon. They were louder than loud, but I chuckled aloud numerous times at their enthusiasm at their vibrant brotherhood.

After they left, Isaac and Brady engaged in one of their customary wrestling matches. No one really "won," but there was much joviality. And again, it made me smile. (And I recorded it for posterity's sake.)

And then this evening, he went and had an early dinner with Bruce from Young Life and Tyler. I know they're both important people in his life, so I'm grateful that he eked out time to spend with them before he leaves. Transitions are tough, but I'm thankful to God that my sweet son is handling his in a way that makes good sense.

August 5

Isaac's college departure date is approaching rapidly, so we're mostly lying low and hanging out as a group while we can.

This evening, after his friends had left and we'd finished with dinner (and the A's game ended with yet another loss -- talk about a tough season), he said he'd like to watch "The Lego Movie." So that's what we did.

Although I cringe at the thought that "Everything is Awesome" may well play in my head on repeat for the next few days, it was truly fun to watch it again. It's great family-fare, full of silly jokes and sillier characters. And it serves as a good reminder that we're all unique and special in our own ways, just as God made us to be. 

August 4

The bros had a laser tag event with the Youth Group this evening, so we packed up and left the cabin this morning after breakfast.

It's a custom of ours to stop at the candy store in Murphy's for treats during the drive home. Given that today is a weekday and we're usually coming through on a weekend, it was delightfully easy to find parking in the little lot behind the store, and the store itself wasn't busy.

We took our time choosing our respective candies (except for Isaac, who knew going in that he wanted sarsaparilla drops. He really, really likes sarsaparilla). Eventually, Brady selected a mix of gummy bears and pink pigs, Adam chose soft licorice, and I doubled up with a single dark chocolate peanut butter cup and a mix of cherry, cinnamon, peppermint, and raspberry hard candies. After a failed phone call to inquire, we made the collective decision to take Abby gummy octopi. (She was, as it turned out, disturbed by their spider-like form.)

Anyway, I'm grateful to re-experience a fun tradition. And I'm grateful for a safe trip back home, too.

August 3

The menfolk and I had a good full day in the Sierras.

It started off with our customary Cabin-breakfast, as Adam whipped up pancakes (made extra fluffy courtesy of the elevation), scrambled eggs, and bacon, and glasses of apple cider. (I had my coffee courtesy of the resident Nespresso machine.)

After we'd all gotten dressed, we drove down to the rec center, where we played 18 "holes" of frisbee golf, which has become one of Isaac's very favorite sports. He learned it at Young Life camp and loves it, so he was eager to introduce it to us. Isaac, naturally, came out on top, but all of the guys fared well. I, conversely, finished with the highest score, but given that I've yet to meet a sport that I'm good at, I'll be pleased with that "accomplishment" and take my participation ribbon.

It was lunchtime by the time we departed the rec center, so we headed to Arnold. Our intended destination was closed, so we made a game-time decision to try out a small strip mall cafe called the Heart and Soul Country Kitchen. Although we went in not knowing what to expect, we wound up with enormous portions (seriously, my crabcake po boy special was as big as my head and included a mound of crispy garlic truffle fries). The servers were friendly and the food was good, so I'd call it a win.

We returned to the cabin and rested for a little while before the boys pulled out Fast Food Franchise and played a round. (Adam dominated big-time.) Dinner was a mix of leftovers (for me) and snack food and potato creations (because of course Brady brought along his big bag of Russets!), followed by a few hands of cards and big slices of apple pie. Even Brady, who is a self-proclaimed hater of all pie, gobbled his up, insisting "it's just apples." I excused myself from the gaming and the guys took a walk, and then returned to play Stratego while I crocheted. 

Phew. There were many blessings sprinkled throughout the past 12 hours, and I am grateful to God for all of them. I am thankful that I got to experience one of Isaac's favorite things in frisbee golf (or frolf, as he calls it). I am thankful that I got to listen to the guys laugh as they played games. And I'm thankful that I got to watch Brady and Isaac standing at the kitchen counter side by side working on their food. We only have a few more days left until Isaac heads off to school, so I'm trying to soak up the sweet moments as best I can because togetherness is a blessing.

August 2

After church this morning, Adam, Isaac, Brady and I loaded into the Explorer and set off for the cabin. (Abby has school so she had to stay home this go-round.)

It was an uneventful trip, with a stop at Sonic in Tracy for lunch and giant beverages (ahh, the sweet, sweet Route44 is a road trip must-have). Brady was in charge of the playlist, so there was much Morgan Wallen and Jordan Davis heard and a running joke about the reality that we were traveling behind Doc Hudson along one of the windy central valley roads. (Really. There were three old cars --the Doc Hudson double, a '32 Ford Adam dubbed The Tricycle, and a Barracuda-- that drove along right at the speed limit, infuriating drivers for miles on end.) At Adam's mom's suggestion, we stopped at the Red Apple to pick up an apple pie (and some apple cider and dried apricots).

Once we arrived, the boys braved the 90-degree heat and went outside to throw the frisbee while I crocheted and Adam took a cat nap. A little later, once Adam and Isaac wrapped up a board game, we went down to the Snowshoe Brewery for dinner. As usual, we enjoyed our entrees as well as the soft pretzels with beer cheese.

Back at the cabin, the male folk worked on trying to solve a collection of metal puzzles Adam pulled out of the game closet while I continued crocheting. They closed out the day with another strategy game and apple pie.

It was, all in all, a good day. I wish Abby could've made the trip with us, but I'm proud of her for all of the work she's done toward earning her credential this summer. So for a safe journey and new memories (and for Abby watering my tomato plants for me since I forgot!), I am thankful.

August 1

I welcomed August by enjoying tea downtown with Nikki and her mom.

Although it was a bit of a scorcher outside and the tea definitely warmed me up from the inside out (as it always does), it was pleasant inside the RoyalTea shop. Nikki, Pam, and I enjoyed the usual assortment of savory and sweet treats along with a quartet of teas served up in whimsical pots. (I still think the strawberry pot should've been topped with the strawberry lid.)

It was a blessing to be able to sit with them and just chat about the summer's happenings and the coming soons.

So for the blessing of friendship --and especially longer-term ones!-- I am very thankful.

July 31

Today is Logan's 20th birthday. How we went from age 5 to age 20 so quickly is utterly baffling, but here we are.

Adam took the day off, and we went to Outback for lunch (since Logan loved that brown bread; and in fact, we wound up with three little loaves this time around, because the first one took quite a while to emerge from the kitchen and our server felt badly about it). 

We mostly did our own things this afternoon, with Brady going to a hitting lesson, Adam and Isaac playing a video game together, Abby working on a school project, and me crocheting. And then this evening, we convened for our customary Logan's birthday dinner of spaghetti and meatballs, followed by a viewing of "Cars" and chocolate cake with chocolate frosting.

It was a good day, filled with familiar things that remind us of Logan and who he was while he was here. And I am grateful to God for the time spent with my favorite people celebrating the one who can't be with us right now.

But it's also morphed into a bittersweet day, because with each passing year, I feel more and more like I'm missing out on really knowing my oldest son. He loved "Cars" and chocolate cake and spaghetti and meatballs and Outback's brown bread when he was here with us. When he was five years old. But I don't get to know what he would like as a 20-year old young man. Would he prefer vanilla now? Would he still have a taste for luxury brands like Lexus and BMW? Would that big smile of his still come easily? I don't get to know. And sometimes, the not knowing is hard on me. I've had the gift of watching Abby and Isaac and Brady grow up and mature and change over time, and although change is never an easy thing, watching them make decisions and become more independent is a gift because it's part of the design of this human life. And it makes me sad that I don't get to watch Logan make choices and learn and grow. It will never make sense, at least not on this side of Heaven.

But I know that despite my feelings, God has a plan and His plan is good. So for that knowledge and for time with family and for the chance to celebrate our sweet Logan once again, I am thankful. Happy 20th birthday, my sweet Sunshine. I love you.

July 30

Abby reminded me this morning that today was Miracle Treat Day at DQ, and since tomorrow is Logan's 20th birthday and he spent a lot of time at Children's Hospital Oakland (which is called something else these days but... oh well. It's forever CHO to us), I took her and the Brositos to get Blizzards to support the cause in his name.

We all had Blizzards, but our orders were as different as we are: Isaac went with a mint concoction, while Abby enjoyed strawberry and angel food cake, Brady picked cookie dough, and I loaded up on different forms (cream, syrup, and chip) of chocolate.

When I'd finished mine, I went back inside to donate a dollar so I could write Logan's name on one of the little paper hot air balloons that line the walls during CMN events. Even though it breaks my heart a little to write "in memory of..." I still feel blessed by the care he received while he was a patient, and I'm grateful to God for the work they continue to do to benefit children. And I'm thankful to have the resources to help support such a vital mission on earth.

July 29

I think it's safe to say that Isaac and Brady are getting in lots of quality bro time of late.

And by "quality bro time" I mean "wrestling, grabbing, lifting, carrying, and otherwise engaging in physical combat and or activity." They engage in such-behavior from morning til bedtime, so it goes on all day long (with breaks, of course. They're not machines). Every day.

And although the good-natured roughhousing can be a lot (and I mean A LOT) sometimes, I'm letting it go because I figure they need the time to connect and bond before Isaac heads off to Wheaton.

They've always had a solid brotherly connection. Way back when, Brady said he planned to work as a miner so he could fund Isaac's baseball career with all of the gold he dug up. And he meant it. And Isaac has always felt extraordinarily protective of Brady. And that's always shown.

I think it's going to be a big adjustment for both of them to be a few thousand miles apart, but I'm praying that the time they spend together now --and have had together in the past-- will serve as a good foundation that will keep them bonded for the long haul. Because as someone who doesn't have a sister and can't relate to their connection, I've always believed that brotherhood is a special gift from God.

July 28

I didn't take many photos today, and the ones that I did take are of me trying to figure out if my hair is really as dark as it seems. Kind of silly, I guess, but for the moment, the answer is yes. It is dark.

And it's dark because I got my hair done this morning. Lately, that process involves a toner mixture to blend out some of the ever-increasing grey population. It'll wash out gradually but for now, it works. And I don't feel quite as dowdy as I did before.

It's not about vanity, really; it's more about feeling neat. So for the blessing of small things that make me feel a little more put together, I am grateful. 

July 27

Isaac left for an overnight trip to Napa with his pals this morning so it was just me, Abby, and Brady today.

Brady returned to his recent kitchen-related hobby by air frying another potato dish. (He followed the same basic recipe as one of last week's experiments and changed up the seasoning a little. He said he definitely preferred them with panko.)

Abby, meanwhile, went for her run, then showered and emerged wearing her giant pink fuzzy thing. As she was putting taquitos in the oven, she crab-skittered across the kitchen floor with oven mitts on her hands. I asked her to do it again; she refused, but she posed in crab-position.

She will probably dislike this image, but it made me laugh so I kept it. I love her silly side. She hides it much of the time, but it's pretty funny when she lets it go. So for the blessing of lighthearted moments, I am thankful.

July 26

Isaac had some of the guys over late this afternoon.

They rumbled up the front steps and through the front door and deposited their shoes in a pile before hanging a left into the living room. (They've been here frequently enough now that they know and respect the no-shoes-in-the-house rule, and I appreciate their collective conscientiousness.)

And then the usual chaos began as they gassed up the gaming system and got down to the business of playing Mario Party, I think it was. 

Although I'm definitely sensitive to noise, their cacophony is always kind of beautiful because it symbolizes that good, safe fun is happening. And I'm grateful to God for providing us with a home that can accommodate that kind of fun for my kiddos and their friends.

July 25

It's so weird that my baby has a permit and is actually learning how to drive. On public roads where other people are driving.

I mean, isn't he like five years old?

But he's not five. He's 15. And Adam took him out for a few hours this afternoon to practice, just like he did so many times with Abby and Isaac. (I'll have my turn when school starts up again next month and he drives to and from Amador with me as his co-pilot.)

Although I truly do wonder where the time went, I'm grateful for this milestone. Although he doesn't exactly love driving just yet, I know that he will come to appreciate the ability to get himself from point A to point B. And I know that he will (probably silently) appreciate the general sense of freedom and independence that having a license gives teens.

So for the blessing of being witness to yet another milestone in his life, I am thankful.

July 24

Today was Isaac's last shift at the Dairy. (I know I said it was yesterday, but he initially had the wrong date in his head.)

Anyway, after Adam wrapped up his workday, Abby, Brady, he and I piled into the car and headed over for some ice cream. Luckily for us, it wasn't super busy and Isaac was running orders and not taking them, so he was able to bring us our treats.

When he appeared holding Abby's milkshake and the three cones we'd ordered, I spied a hand-written sign taped to his shirt that read "It's My Last Day." I pointed it out and snapped a pic, and he half-chuckled and said he wasn't thrilled about wearing it.

But I'm glad he did, because it's right that he should be recognized in some way on his last day. He's had fun working there over the past year-plus. He's made some friends and learned a bit about how a business runs. And he's had the opportunity to talk to probably thousands of people. That job has been a great match for his personality, allowed him to build up some savings, and taught him about responsibility. Although he doesn't like it when I say this, I'm proud of him for taking it on and for doing a great job. 

So for all of those good gifts, I am grateful. 

July 23

I don't particularly enjoy cooking, probably because a handful of picky eaters who shall remain unnamed didn't care for culinary variety during their early years. But I did have more fun than I expected helping Brady make dinner today. 

While he was trying to figure out what he wanted to eat this afternoon, he pulled a box of Bisquick out of the pantry with an eye toward preparing pancakes. (With chocolate chips, since we have a big bag on the shelf.) 

But a recipe for cheeseburger pie printed on the back of the box caught his eye, and he decided he wanted to make that instead. Since it was a multi-step process, I suggested he wait a few hours and make it for dinner, with an assist from me. He agreed, so off to the store we went for ground beef and an onion, the two things we didn't already have on-hand.

When the clock struck 5:45, we got to work. We walked through the steps of the recipe together, and he did most of the actual prep and clean-up, from dicing the onion (with sunglasses in place) to washing the dishes. I was mainly the supervisor who cracked the eggs and carefully slid the very full pie plate into the oven. And told him how "brown" was "brown enough" for the cooked beef and which knife he should use to cut the onion. (And many other little details that I've had filed away in my brain for years that he didn't yet know.) And the final product? I thought it was pretty tasty, so it was a win.

It's such a gift to be able to spend quality time with my kiddos that doubles as education. Of course, I try to "teach" them every day with how I react to them and to others and to situations, but to be able to share knowledge I've acquired over my own lifetime that will expand their own bodies of practical knowledge feels special. So tonight I am grateful to God for the time with Brady and for his willingness to listen and learn.

July 22

Isaac's last day of work at the Dairy is tomorrow, and since Abby has evening class, she wanted to be sure she got to see him on-shift one more time.

So she, Brady, and I loaded into my loaner car (because two and a half weeks later, my car is still at BMW waiting for its new hybrid battery) and headed over to get some ice cream early this afternoon.

Isaac was working the register so he wasn't able to make our cones for us, but he did see us in the walk-up line and waved animatedly in our direction. And when he had a free moment, he did come over to say hello and to introduce us to one of his co-workers. 

He's a good kiddo, and I'm grateful that he's had the opportunity to work this job. I know he's enjoyed the experience and I appreciate how it's taught him more about financial responsibility than he ever could have learned from school alone. So for the blessings of first jobs and for the taste of fresh ice cream on a summer afternoon, I am grateful.

July 21

As I left the house to pick up Brady from church this afternoon, I spied a plume of brown and white smoke as it rose above the nearby hills and into the blue sky. Although I had an inkling that it probably wasn't a good thing to see smoke on a very dry 100-degree day, I didn't think much of it at the time.

But then I checked the Watch Duty app and saw that the smoke I saw was from a wildfire that started in nearby Sunol. And I watched as, over just a short period of time, the fire spread from 75 acres to 150. And then to 400. And then I watched as mandatory evacuation orders appeared on the map. And I listened as helicopters and planes flew by overhead, providing air assistance to the ground crews.

When Ruby Hill --a community a few miles down the road from us-- received evac orders, I calmly told the boys to gather up their irreplaceable prized possessions just in case. And I texted Abby (who was at school) and Adam (who was at work) and asked them if there was anything they wanted me to get for them, too. I packed up photo albums and mementos and important documents, and watched with interest as my kiddos chose their own irreplaceables: Isaac picked items from my grandma's house and Bibles and things he'd handwritten over the years. Brady grabbed BearBear, Chub, Bagger, and Froggy, who are his four favorite stuffies, and the ring he got for winning a baseball tournament last year. (I almost cried when he plunked them down on the dining room table and declared "just about everything else can be replaced.") Abby wanted Pilly and Blankie (which, quite obviously, were her childhood pillow and blanket), and Adam requested a book of pictures Logan drew.

The fire grew to 950 acres and the evacuation line came within a single street of our house, so we literally sat around waiting for directions. Isaac meandered between the deck outside --looking up at the sky and the helicopters and the planes-- and inside. Brady followed me from room to room. Eventually, I sat down on the steps near the front door, and Brady plunked down nearby while Isaac settled into the dining room across the way. I prayed aloud for the firefighters and for everyone affected by the fire. 

The evac line hadn't moved in a few hours, so Adam and I decided over text that we'd offer to take the boys to dinner with us. And they agreed to go. We packed all of our irreplaceables into the Explorer (just in case something changed), and went downtown to Strizzi's.

Since then, the evac lines have been pulled back, and we're no longer on the edge of the danger zone. I'll still probably sleep with one eye open and I'm not in a hurry to unpack my irreplaceables, but I'm grateful that the immediate threat seems to have been resolved.

Although the experience stressed me out, I'm thankful that I had the opportunity to see what my children view as their prized possessions. And I'm grateful that they --at least in my opinion-- chose well: they went with sentimental items like photos and writings and things that hold special memories for them. (And I'm also grateful for the reminder that I should get to work on digitizing all of my old film photos.)

And beyond all of that, I am grateful to God for being with every single person who is out doing hard, demanding work in hot weather to keep the rest of us safe. I am thankful that He gave each of them the desire to serve and the bravery to serve well.

July 20

The house was still and quiet when I got back from my coffee outing this morning. A few minutes later, Isaac padded down the stairs and joined me in the kitchen. He confirmed that he'd already eaten and aimlessly circled the island a few times, so I asked if he wanted to play Go Fish. 

And since he's a do'er, he said yes. (I was pretty sure he would when I asked.) So I retrieved a deck of cards from the nearby desk and we played several rounds of Go Fish at the kitchen table.

It wasn't anything groundbreaking, but it gave us the chance to connect. As we played, I asked him questions: which of his friends are going to leave for school first? (Probably him, he said.) What is he looking forward to about going to college? (Learning, he said. Learning things he's interested in learning about and not what the school says he should learn; that's what I knew he meant. And also seeing snow, he said.)

We sat and shuffled and Go Fished until he said he needed to take a shower and get ready to head to work. 

It was just a few hands of cards, but I'm grateful to God for the time spent with my soon to be college guy.

July 19

Way back when, we used to go to A's games fairly regularly. There was nothing quite like kicking back on the third deck of the Coliseum on two-dollar ticket Wednesdays, munching on one-dollar hot dogs while watching the likes of Barry Zito, Eric Chavez, and Eric Tejada as they put on a show under the lights. Those were some good days. But that was a long time ago now.

In fact, we hadn't seen the A's play live since they left Oakland, mostly because it's just not convenient to go anymore. (And also because we don't like John Fisher. Boooo. Sell the team.) But today, we finally took the 90-minute drive to Sacramento and settled into our seats at Sutter Health Park to take in a game.

Although they did what they've done more often than not of late and lost to the Nationals, it was a fun new experience. Since it's a Triple A ballpark, it's very small, so it has a homier feeling than the much larger, much more urban Coliseum we're used to visiting. Though it was hot, hot, hot out (in the 90s) and the sun was bright and mostly unrelenting, we still had a good time watching and cheering and hanging out together (even if Abby did irritate Isaac and Brady by alternating her two hats --since she had one from the Nats game we attended last year in DC, she brought it along with her A's cap-- from inning to inning). And Abby and Isaac even came away with squishy A's balls that they caught when the broadcasters in the booth above us tossed them down to spectators. Talk about fortunate!

So tonight, I am grateful to God for time with my family. I am thankful for the blessing of their company and for the ways we can both amuse and care for one another.

July 18

Brady has historically gone on cooking jags. I can't remember them all offhand because there was been a few, but I know that at one point, he really liked making pancakes, so he ate and consumed a lot of them.

His current culinary interest is working with potatoes. And more specifically, potatoes and the air fryer I bought Adam for his birthday (which said-husband does not use).

He started off by just reheating pre-cooked items like frozen French fries. It helped him to get a feel for how the machine works. Then he moved on to grating fresh potatoes to make hash browns. When they were a little too loosey-goosey for his taste, he added cornstarch to said-hash browns and created patties that held together. 

Then today, he decided to make potato chips. He used my veggie slicer (which is a marvelous contraption, for the record), brushed them with olive oil (as he doing in the image), and sprinkled them with salt.

I had one after they were done and it was quite good! Definitely crispy, and I am definitely a girl who prefers crispy to not-crispy when it comes to my air fried potato products. I think he was pleased with the outcome, and I was pleased to see him successfully tackle a new task. It's a blessing to witness his confidence --and patience and perseverance-- grow over time.

July 17

I was working on my latest crochet project in the bedroom this afternoon when Isaac and Brady suddenly (and loudly) appeared. 

Now they don't just enter a room together these days; it's truly more like they storm castle gates. There's lots of chatter and arms and legs flying everywhere. It's simultaneously funny and exhausting, and definitely overstimulating.

But I love it nonetheless. And then I loved it even more when, a few minutes later, Brady left to find BearBear and Isaac picked up my stuffed cat SOC (pronounced "sock") and wrapped him in an embrace. 

I watched him as he sprawled across the foot of my bed hugging my cat. And I smiled to myself. He may be 18, but he's still my little boy. And I am grateful to God for the gift that he continues to be to me.

July 16

This is what I get these days when I say "okay, I want to take a picture of you guys."

Fine. It's fine. Really, totally fine. I love that all of the recent photos I have of them look more or less like this.

But to my actual point... Isaac has chalk paint on his face and they're wearing matching green t-shirts because they're both volunteering at VBS this week. Isaac is a teacher for the older kids, and Brady is a youth leader for the younger ones. (That's simplified because I can't remember exactly which grades they're each with.)

I'm pleased that they both chose to spend some of their time --and if Brady's glue-stained shirt and Isaac's face are any indication, also a bit of patience-- helping to tell the next generation about Jesus. It's a small act, but who knows -- it could wind up having huge implications for a child who attends.

July 15

Although both Abby and I were dealing with stuffy noses when we got up today, we still enjoyed a nice trip to the Mother Ship and then Costco.

After we finished strolling up and down the aisles and checked out, we stopped by the food court for some lunchtime munchies. 

We chit chatted as we finished our pizza (her) and hot dog (me), and then I offered to buy a big chocolate chip cookie and split it with her. 

She agreed. And here I am with my half. (And her half, actually.)

It was a good time with my favorite girl enjoying a sweet treat. So for all of those blessings, I am grateful.

July 14

I didn't sleep particularly well last night; I'm pretty sure I have an allergy/cold combo platter and it makes resting simultaneously essential and difficult.

So I spent most of the day keeping up with decongestants and cough drops (because part of my ailment involves coughing... lots of coughing). It wasn't very exciting, but it seemed to help.

So this evening, on this day that involved me mostly lying low, I'm thankful to God for medications that alleviate symptoms and for my wonderful pellet ice maker. Because small comforts can make a big difference.

July 13

Isaac came home from the first day of VBS, went to the gym, and then came home and crashed on the couch.

He slept and slept and slept some more. And he talked in his sleep, because he does that sometimes. I'm not sure what he said because it was fairly mumbly, but his words were animated if not intelligible. He was clearly engaging with someone in his dreams.

It was good to just watch him rest for a while. He'll be off to school in less than a month; in fact, he got his roommate assignment today, and I know he's looking forward to meeting Thomas from Kentucky. So I'm very conscious that the the days of summer are waning. And I want to be sure to try to soak up the moments as best I can, because the moments --the little ones like these that are so easy to miss-- are blessings.

July 12

It was a hot, muggy day, and for some reason, Abby and I decided that it would be fun to take a walk during the mid-afternoon hours.

Of course, when we left the house, we didn't know that it was hot and still a sticky out. So we stuck it out and wound up having a lovely stroll up and down some of the nearby streets as we burned calories and chit-chatted about life.

It was good, unexpected quality time with my favorite girl and I'm always thankful for that. She's funny and intelligent and has lots of interesting things to say. God is crafting her into a remarkable young woman and watching the transformation is a gift.

July 11

We had Adam's parents and his brother's family over this afternoon for some pool-time and birthday celebrations.

It wound up being a really nice day to be outside, as the sun hid behind the clouds at times, which kept the temperature in a pleasant range. The kiddos popped in and out of the pool; the cousins were particularly taken with the raft Isaac and Brady constructed earlier this summer, and enjoyed "paddling" it with a big stick. (And then trying to overturn it when Brady --who is several years older and much larger-- took a turn to float.)

Since Adam's dad was one of the celebrants, Adam made a spice cake with homemade penuche frosting --Steve's favorite-- and we all enjoyed a slice with ice cream before the party came to a close.

I pulled out the tripod (like I do) and snapped a trio of group pictures -- one "normal" and two silly. This, obviously, is a silly one. So today, I'm thankful for family and parties and birthdays and pool time and lovely weather. And I'm thankful that God is a good, good God who provides all good gifts.

July 10

I'll begin by noting that I stole this picture from Abby, as I wasn't with them when it was taken.

With that said, the kiddos piled into Abby's car this afternoon to go on a sibling bonding excursion. They started out at Yogurtland for some frozen treats, and then headed east to play mini golf and drive go-karts at Boomers.

Although there was a bit of resistance from the junior member of the group before they left the house, they all returned in a good mood. So I'd call it an excellent use of money. (Mine, since I offered to foot the bill.)

Sibling relationships are unique and special. I know things will be different after Isaac goes to Wheaton next month, so I'm grateful that they took some time for one another in the now.

July 9

We're in one of those milestone-rich phases of parenthood.

Abby graduated from college. Isaac graduated from high school. And this morning, Brady and I went down to the DMV and he secured his permit. (Which was called a learner's permit when I was a kid. At any rate, it means he can now officially learn how to drive.)

It's rather unnerving to internalize the reality that my baby is now legally allowed to drive a car (or at least he will be after he takes his first behind-the-wheel lesson next week). It makes logical sense of course, since he's 15 1/2 and 15 1/2 year olds are allowed to get permits. It just blows my mind that he's going to be 16 at the end of the year because I can so clearly remember him driving the little cars at LegoLand when we went about 10 years ago. I remember how cautious he was; how he stopped  completely at the stop signs and waited for traffic to clear before making turns, even though most of the other children drove like maniacs. Adam and I mused at the time that he'd grow up to be a good driver but back then it seemed like it would be so long before he'd be driving an actual car... but here we are.

Anyway, since I'm mostly rambling, I'll just say that though I'm shocked by how quickly time is passing, I'm grateful for the milestones. Because watching my kiddos hit each and every one of them is a blessing.

July 8

I rather missed the boys' shenanigans when Isaac was at camp. Given how raucous and just plain noisy they tend to be, that reality surprised me, but it's the truth.

So I was gratified this morning when, after running out for coffee and then on to the store for glue sticks (for Abby) and eggs (for Isaac), I came home to find them like this.

Well, not exactly like this of course, since this is just a representative still frame. But I found Brady pursuing Isaac and jumping onto his back, and then twisting himself around into what looked like terribly uncomfortable positions. But they were both amused. And they laughed.

And I could feel the love. So as always, I am thankful to God for their bond, even if its trappings sometimes look a bit weird to me.

July 7

I love it when my kiddos get along. And today, the sense of comradery they share at times was strong.

It began with Isaac's return from camp. It's not unusual for Brady to avoid hugs, but he readily accepted Isaac's embrace when we got home from the airport. 

Then later in the day, Abby meandered into the family room as Brady and I were watching the World Cup match between Switzerland and Colombia. After they exchanged a few of their typical barbs, she got up, stood behind Brady, and began playing with his hair. The curling wand even came out. And Brady just went with the flow.

So anyway, for the blessing of harmonious relationships, I am grateful.

July 6

It's been a fun, lowkey evening at home.

We started off by watching the US play in their World Cup round of 16 match-up against Belgium (you win some, you lose some) over Chick Fil A.

When that ended, Adam turned on an old episode of "Matlock" and we watched that while savoring slices of leftover pie. 

And to complete my culinary adventure, I poured myself a glass of pomegranate juice and prosecco.

None of it was particularly fancy, but it was fun. And I am grateful for the time with my hunny and Brady.

July 5

Church this morning was really excellent.

It started with a thought-provoking message on Psalm 23 that perfectly walked the line between humor and truth.

And it concluded with a few minutes with this gal right here. Jen moved away to Texas a number of years ago, but we spent several years prior to her move as across-the-street neighbors. In fact, she had the distinction of being my on-call person to take care of Abby, Logan, and Isaac when I went into labor with Brady. (The morning he was born wound up being a crazy-frenetic one, but we both remember it!)

She's a gem, and it's always a blessing to be able to catch up a bit in person.

July 4

Our great nation's 250th birthday was a quiet, calm one at our house. 

Most of our overt observance of the occasion centered around food, as we nibbled on red, white, and blue donuts and cupcakes; homemade apple and cherry pies whipped up by Adam; strawberry, blueberry, and banana fruit skewers by Abby; and of course, hot dogs, hamburgers, and potato salad. My girl even made herself a beverage she found online that featured Sprite, blue Gatorade, grenadine, and whipped cream. (I didn't taste it but it looked pretty cool.) And for good measure, we also had red, white, and blue M&Ms and fourth of July themed Sour Patch Kids (which were, of course, red, white, and blue).

We watched some baseball and World Cup soccer (sorry, it's soccer) on TV, and enjoyed a quick round of US History trivia (courtesy of Abby and Google) after dinner. It was all very chill.

But the calmest, quietest part of the day came as the sky darkened and Adam took Abby and Brady closer to downtown to watch the fireworks display at the fairgrounds. I'm not big on crowds and loud noises (even loud music is too much for me these days), so I opted to stay home. As the light outside grew increasingly dim, I donned my robe and flip flips and stole up the steps to the observation deck.

The sunset was of the pretty, muted pink and orange ilk, and I stood by the railing watching as the color faded to a steely gray and the lights of the valley below appeared, one by one, flickering like fireflies. I could hear the bang, bang of fireworks in the distance and occasionally, the fingers of one would briefly reach high enough into the sky that I could see it. None were particularly close, but I enjoyed the view nonetheless, because in that moment, I still recognized that it was a beautiful view, even without a special show.

But then something unexpected happened. After 15 minutes of squinting to see tiny spectacles on the other side of the valley, there was a bang that sounded much closer followed by a beautiful spray of white light off to the left. And what followed was the same stunning display that Adam and the kiddos were seeing from a different vantage point. I watched, mesmerized, as variously colored lights ascended into the sky, exploded, and showered the earth with their splendor. It was a display well-suited to a 250th birthday.

As I stood there watching from my perch, lots of thoughts flitted through my mind. One is that this country may have its problems, but it's still an amazing place to call home. And those of us blessed enough to live here are just that --blessed-- whether we truly realize it or not. We can watch fireworks and eat cupcakes and hamburgers and have parties with friends and express our opinions and dress how we like and worship as we choose. Life isn't like that everywhere. It's also a land of opportunities and second chances; it's a place where patience and perseverance can yield rewards that are bigger and better than we could ever have imagined. 

So today, I am grateful to God for 250 of this nation. And I pray that He will continue to have His hand on our leaders and that they will do what is right in His eyes, even if it's not always what is popular.

July 3

Abby's first summer term ended yesterday and since she didn't have any homework, she came with me to the Mother Ship this morning.

In honor of reaching a milestone in her program, I bought her a frou frou drink. (I don't remember exactly what it was, but it had blue cold foam on top and matcha in the drink itself. The important part is that she liked it and I didn't just flush $6.75.)

From there we jaunted through Target and then Grocery Outlet. Abby often expresses how she'd hyped for the fourth, so she wanted to get red, white, and blue food for tomorrow.

It was a pleasant day with my girl. We haven't had a lot of time to hang out since summer school started, so the outing was a blessing.

July 2

I had the munchies a little while ago, so I trolled the pantry and found the box of Strawberry Vanilla Chex that I stashed in an out-of-the-way (also known as Brady Resistant) corner yesterday. The angels sang. (Not really, but I was really pleased and may have fist pumped the air.)

It's probably more sugar than I need, but it's definitely one of my favorite cereals these days. 

So I sat in my seat in the family room and happily crunched those little squares while Adam and I watched the evening World Cup game on TV.

It's a very small thing, but it made me happy. So today, I'm thankful for the blessing of tasty snacks that hit the proverbial spot.

July 1

My allergies flared overnight and I woke up sneezing. (And then I sneezed some more. And more.) I did my customary Starbucks run to see Terry and the guys, dropped by Safeway for some yogurt (since Brady texted me that his teeth hurt from his new retainers so he didn't have much to eat), and then returned home for the day.

I spent the rest of my Wednesday trying to lie low as the sneezing continued and the sinus pressure increased. But rather than frittering away the hours doing nothing at all, I decided I'd buckle down and do some more work on the little pink blanket I've been crocheting for the past few weeks.

I know I've said it before, but it's true that I get a great deal of satisfaction from doing things for other people. I have no idea who will eventually receive this particular piece, but I know that God knows. And I'm grateful that He gave me a practical talent that can be used to bless other people.

June 30

After the extravaganza of busyness that was yesterday, today was very calm by comparison.

In fact, it was more or less a run of the mill day that featured Brady playing computer games and Abby going to class. And it also included our usual date night, this time at Cattlemen's.

It was, as always, good to sit there with my hunny, just going over the day's happenings as we lingered over dinner.

So for the blessing of time together, I am grateful.

June 29

It was a busy Monday at the Wight house.

Bright and early (even before coffee), Brady has his braces removed after a comparatively brief 16-month term. (Abby and Isaac were not so fortunate.) We "celebrated" at Starbucks (even though it was really just me wanting the previously referenced coffee). 

Abby took her new car --her graduation present, which arrived over the weekend while she was in Illinois wedding'ing it up-- for a maiden cruise up the freeway to her class. She reported that it went well.

And Isaac packed up his suitcase and headed to Young Life camp. This year they're going to British Columbia, so rather than dropping him off to catch a bus, his friend Tyler's mom drove them both to SFO to catch a flight to Seattle.

And me? After a brain toot caused me to miss my Bible study, I went home and continued working on the border of a small blanket. 

It was a busy day that featured several firsts for our family: Brady's first moments post-braces and his first piece of gum in more than a year. Abby's first time driving a car that's titled in her name. And Isaac's first trip out of the US. So for the blessing of fun firsts, I am thankful.

(And I'm also thankful for the timely arrival of Abby's car and for Isaac's camp schedule, because my car decided to have a fit over the weekend and is in the shop for the time being. With Isaac out of town and Abby having wheels of her own, I'm free to use the kid-car. Phew. Thank you, God, for Your provision!)