March 6

Today was another melody kind of day. I know I've said it before, but it's still true: music speaks to me. And sometimes, God uses it to speak to me.

This song, Garth Brooks' Learning to Live Again, has always made me cry, but even moreso since Logan was diagnosed and subsequently passed on. Why? Because I feel like in a lot of ways, I am indeed in the process of figuring out how to live without him.

Learning to live again.

I may not have outward physical scars, but that doesn't mean I don't feel broken. It doesn't mean that I don't feel different. And I definitely don't feel like I fit in much of the time. So I told myself at the very beginning of the year that if I ever heard this song on the radio, I'd know it was for me. So when it came on as I was driving Isaac to preschool this morning, I knew it was today's little reminder. And I cried. It was a good cry, but a cry nonetheless.

It's something I do more than I admit now while I'm... da-dum... learning to live again.