February 7

I feel like I floated through today, buoyed by the prayers of our friends and family. I felt so high that I didn't even need to ask if prayers were being said because it was just that obvious. If you've never had a day like that, you're missing out on a big-time heavenly gift.

My human heart will always be broken over losing Logan and you all know that I'm not a shove-Christianity-down-your-throat kind of person, but it has to be said: I would not have floated through today and overcome so much of the sadness that is prevalent for me this time of year without Jesus. The fact that I laughed and smiled and lip synced to music in my living room and felt actual joy was possible only because I know that my Sunshine is safe in Heaven. So to everyone who is praying for us and to everyone who has gently pointed me in the right direction when I was on the verge of going astray... thank you. You are a blessing to me.

Of course, I can't illustrate that. (Man alive, how I wish I could). But I can share a snapshot of just a single moment of the freedom I felt.

After my deacons' meeting tonight, I drove across town to pick up Abby from her youth group gathering. As we headed home, we enjoyed our usual witty banter. She's currently obsessed with the musical Hairspray so she chattered on and on (and on and on, seriously, I have no idea how she does it) about the songs and the characters. Just when I was tempted to roll my eyes, I had a sudden flashback of myself at 12 and remembered how I'd so often peppered my own mom with endless commentary of my own. I almost laughed aloud at the revelation that she is, in many ways, me. I don't know why I thought a duckface was a good idea, but well, whoop, there it is.

Life can definitely break your heart, but don't let the hard times steal your joy. I know that every day won't be like today for me, but I'll store up the goodness like a treasure and rest on it when I feel like I can't do anything else.