Interaction number one was with a lovely young mom and her almost one-year old son. Jocelyn sat across from me in one of the comfy chairs in the corner and attempted to give her baby a bottle, but he was far too interested in staring at me to eat. So she and I chatted. I complimented his rapt attention and focus and she told me about how they're going to go to Mexico --where she's from-- to have him baptized for his first birthday later this month because she's so grateful that he's alive. Because, she told me, he was born two months early and spent six weeks in the NICU at --wait for it-- CHO. Where we spent so much time with our sweet Logan. So I in turn shared a bit about him and us and we commiserated over how utterly exhausting Hospital Life is and over the trauma that lingers even after The Stay ends. And I assured her that one day, when the time is ready, God will use her experience to help someone else through a hard time. And then, before she left, she complimented my work in progress, which I'd pulled out to show her after noticing the lovely, soft handmade blanket that was wrapped around her son.
Exchange number two followed not long after number one as a woman I'd never met got my attention to tell me how pretty my work was. I thanked her, and she smiled and asked if I, like her, have multiple projects going on at once. We had a very brief but pleasant interaction and then she headed out.
The final exchange involved my friend Rob, whose wife passed away earlier this year. He's a very open kind of guy, and told me that although he was feeling good today, yesterday was a different story. And he expressed frustration over how he'll be feeling fine but then, out of the blue, the tears will come for no discernible reason. I nodded and listened and teared up more than once, because oh, my heart. I do so understand. And then I assured him that even though I know he feels like he must be crazy, he's not. And I told him that when he feels the negative thoughts press in on him, to tell the Devil "not today." He liked that and said he'd try it. And I told him to just keep on trying, even when it feels like it's not working or when it's hard. When he left, he gave me a big hug.
So what made all of these exchanges so remarkable? Well for one, none of these people knew it, but I've been wondering if I'm just wasting time crocheting and if anyone would really want anything I make. So those unanticipated compliments meant something. And for another, I've been thinking of Logan a lot lately and lamenting that things didn't go differently for us. But being able to use my experience to encourage others means a lot to me because it makes his death feel just a little less pointless.
So yes, I'd say God showed up today for me in tangible, real ways, through multiple people. And I am grateful.
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