August 31

I was sitting in the car with the windows rolled down this afternoon, waiting on the end-of-day bell to ring at Brady's school while working on a fall-inspired project, when a gentle breeze rustled my hair just the tiniest bit.

I paused my work, looked up at the hills in the distance, closed my eyes, and just sat in the moment. Enjoyed the breeze. Took a nice, long breath.

Now the breath itself could've been more pleasant; smoke from distant wildfires has made the atmosphere pretty hazy for the last few days. But the intent to enjoy was there, so a deep sense of satisfaction and gratitude followed.

It was a terrific reminder to me that gratitude is warranted at all times -- not just when things are going my way and not only when the skies overhead are perfectly clear.

August 30

And just like that, we're back to baseball season.

Okay, well, technically we were back to baseball on Monday when Adam took the boys up to their first joint TVBR practice, but since I didn't take them until today, it wasn't officially official in my mind. But anyhow.

There's something sweet about the sight of Isaac and Brady crammed into the backseat with their bags and cleats and water bottles and other sporting sundries. They're both (much) bigger than they were when they first whacked a ball off a tee, but the enthusiasm for the game remains a constant. 

So for all of that, I am grateful.

August 29

I was scrolling on Facebook not long ago when I saw that my friend Erin had posted about wanting to give away excess squash. Given that I love yellow squash and rarely have it, I offered to take some off her hands. So I did. And then last night she messaged me to ask if I wanted any more, and I said sure, I could take a few. She mentioned that they were kinda sorta economy-sized but I didn't know just how large they were until I picked up the bag from her front porch this afternoon and found these monsters inside.

I should've included my hand for scale but trust me when I say that they're two of the biggest yellow squash I've ever seen (and I've seen lots and lots of yellow squash over the years). I'll be eating them for days.

And I'll probably smiling the whole time, too, since my grandma regularly served sliced yellow squash from the garden along with dinner when I was young. 

It's a beautiful bite of nostalgia, and I am grateful for the memories (and for friends who share their bounty!).

August 28

I was out and about this morning after my Bible study when I pulled up to a red light and glanced out the window.

And this is what I saw: a largely unmaintained median, complete with patches of weeds and leaves-past-their prime and trash and even handfuls of gravel. 

But what caught my attention amid those less glamorous items vying for notice were the clusters of vibrant yellow flowers. I looked at them for a few moments before the light turned green and I drove away.

But I kept thinking about them. They were a good reminder to me to keep seeking out beauty in unexpected places. 

August 27

I went shopping last week and bought the boys some Sunday-appropriate shirts, since neither of them had any with short sleeves. (Don't ask where all of Isaac's old clothes went because I have no clue. He may well have eaten them because they're nowhere in his room.) I got two of the same one in different sizes just because it amused me to think of them wearing the same outfit like they did when they were little, but I didn't think they'd actually do it.

But I was wrong, because when we left for church this morning, they were wearing said shirts, as well as khakis and black dress shoes. When I asked, they confirmed --with great enthusiasm-- that they had deliberately twinned.

And they were greatly pleased with themselves for it, too. 

And honestly, so was I. I love their goofiness and I adore their love for one another. 

August 26

I'd always heard the rumors that teenage boys eat a lot, and I can now confirm with 100 percent certainty that the claim is valid. 

While Brady devours Cheerios and other cereals by the handful, Isaac's current munchie-of-choice is scrambled eggs (and as I write this, I can hear the words of "Green Eggs and Ham" echoing in the halls of my mind). He frequently makes them in the morning before school, but he craves them, at less logical times. One day last week, for example, his hankering for protein drove him to cook up a panful at 10pm. And this photo was taken at 2:30 this afternoon, a few hours after lunch and a few before dinner.

Anyway, I have no great observation to share, other than my go-to "I'm thankful that he's still growing and thriving." Because I am. And I'm grateful that he's getting his protein, too.

August 25

I'm really good at ordering school pictures. In all the years I've had kiddos in class, I've never missed one. But I'm also really, really terrible at handing them out. I have envelopes full of undistributed images. So this year I decided to go simple.

I chose just the digital download option for both boys, and today I received both files. So there we have it: Isaac as a high school sophomore on the left, and Brady as a seventh grader on the right. Voila! And now they've been officially shared with friends and family so I'm way ahead of the Christmas card curve.

But seriously, I'm grateful for these two and for all of the color they add to my life. And I'm thankful for advancements in technology that allow me to share photos with a click.

August 24

This is what I see when I walk up the steps from the garage these days.

It varies from moment to moment, of course, depending on which hat is being used and if the gloves are in or out of the baseball bags, but this is the general idea.

And although it should probably annoy me it doesn't, because it's a snapshot of what life is like at our house these days; it's emblematic of the truth that baseball is a big (big) part of our lives. And it reminds me that a pair of amazing, wonderful boys live (and are clearly quite comfortable) here.

I know the next few years will fly by; they certainly did for Abby. So I'll savor the sights and the moments as they come, even if they're messier than I may ordinarily like.

August 23

This evening Adam and I ventured over to Brady's school for back-to-school night, where we walked through his schedule, listened to his teachers, and got a feel for the year that's to come. And when that ended, we decided to go to dinner downtown.

It wasn't at all crowded so we made our way to our chosen restaurant, got a table, and ordered in good time. And then we just talked about the day's events as we nibbled our bread and salad and pasta.

It was a simple evening but a good one because it gave us a chance to share life in a practical way. (We gotta eat, right?) So for that time and for our conversation, I am grateful.

August 22

Brady (as he often does) made his way downstairs and into the car this morning before I was ready to go.

And this is what I saw staring at me from the back seat when I finally sidled my way up to the driver's side a few minutes later.

This youngest son of ours is studious and particular and detail-oriented. And extraordinarily organized and driven. (Seriously, he has an entire morning routine and actually sticks to it.) But he's also a huge goofball, too.

So for the laughs he can so easily bring to the mundane moments of life with his antics, I am thankful.

August 21

Aside from my temperature blankets (yep, there are two very different versions in the works), I'm not currently working on any big projects. I am, however, trying out swatches of new-to-me designs and patterns and techniques.

This is one I'm working on today. It's advertised as "simple" in the instructional YouTube video but as with many things, that term is relative. Very, very relative.

But my guess is that eventually, I'll figure it out, as has been the case with many challenges I've faced over time. So tonight, I'm thankful that I was created to press forward even when the directions presented aren't super clear.

August 20

I was settling into my chair in the family room a little while ago when I felt prompted to go up to the observation deck in the backyard.

And I'm so glad that I obeyed that nudge because this is what I saw when I got there and looked out across the valley below.

I feel a little bit bad posting this when I know that my family and friends in Southern California are actively dealing with tropical storm Hilary, but that truth doesn't negate my gratitude to the One who made everything for this stunningly majestic view of His creation.

August 19

I went out back this afternoon to see how the apples are coming along (the verdict: close but not quite ready for consumption) and the weather was so pleasant that I took a seat on the deck and just enjoyed the moment.

We are so, so blessed to have such a beautiful place to spend our time, and I am so grateful to have it. 

And I'm also grateful that the temps were down and the sky was so blue. Small things, but so very meaningful. And so easily (and often) overlooked.

August 18

I just love Jaime and her entire family. They are truly wonderful people with truly wonderful hearts. So of course I was looking forward to our coffee date this morning.

And it did not disappoint. We spent two and a half hours parked in my usual Mother Ship corner meandering from one topic to another. 

It was never difficult. Silences --although very rare-- were entirely comfortable. And although we don't agree on everything, we have a mutual respect for one another that transcends our differences. 

So today, I'm grateful for her and her sweet spirit and for our friendship.

August 17

Today Adam and I celebrated our 21st wedding anniversary. As Abby reflected last week, our marriage is now old enough to drink.

Although he had work and I had the usual mom-taxi responsibilities in play, we observed the occasion this evening at Haps, where we consumed way too much food (including the delicious peach crisp and anniversary candle-adorned brownie sundae pictured) and talked about what was, is, and might be. 

I'm not sure that either of us had any grand reflections to share (beyond his "I'm still glad you said yes" and my "it's simultaneously unbelievable that it's already been more than two decades and unbelievable that it hasn't been much longer than two decades") but I will say this: marriage is a beautiful thing. It really is. It's not easy, but it's worth the effort, especially if you're blessed with a dedicated, devoted, caring, and loving partner like mine.

Happy Anniversary, hunny! I love you.

August 16

I love fun little routines, like my Wednesday morning trips to the Mother Ship with Brady.

And in fact, we had our first Starbucks run of the new school year today. While I had my usual blonde roast coffee, Brady enjoyed a chocolate cake pop.

But he didn't eat it right away; he held it in his hand for a few minutes. And then I noticed he was looking at me expectantly. And finally it dawned on me: he was waiting to take our usual photo.

And so we did. And I am grateful that he remembered.

August 15

I don't know much about meteorology, but the weather of late makes me believe there's a connection of some sort between humidity and interesting cloud formations. 

This is my hypothesis because a) it's been unusually humid here for the past few days and b) this was just one of the views the sky afforded me this morning as I ran errands.

Pretty beautiful, I think. And for that loveliness, I am grateful.

August 14

Isaac and Brady started school last week --sophomore year for the former, seventh grade for the latter-- but since I was in Chicago, today was my first day driving the mom-bus.

Given that last year at this time I was mired in trying to deal with all three kiddos being at new schools and all of the associated schedule changes, this year feels like the proverbial piece of cake. The same schools, the same bell schedules, and the same pick-up/drop-off routine. Phew.

There were, of course, a few changes. When I got up, I was surprised (shocked really) to find that Isaac was already awake and dressed. (Last year I had to drag him out of bed every day while singing the 'time to get up' song I made up just for him.) But the framework of the day was the same.

So for those changes that signal growing maturity (like Isaac's early preparation) and for the blessing of familiarity, I'm thankful.

August 13

Last year my mom entered a blanket and a doll hat that I made for her in the local county fair without telling me. My pieces fared well, so this year I decided I'd just give her a small collection of six items to enter on my behalf. And this morning she texted me the results: six blue ribbons and a champion.

I don't want this post to come across as bragging because that's not what I'm doing. The placements are wonderful and I love knowing that the attention to detail and time and care that I poured into each piece was recognized, but it goes deeper than that for me. See, I grew up volunteering at the fair --in fact, some of my earliest memories are rooted in those humid August days-- just like my parents and my grandparents before them. I can remember the feeling of seeing those special people I saw just once a year. I can remember helping the judges in the clothing section --which my mom and grandma chaired-- and I can remember trotting out from my perch behind the table to retrieve lost balloons from the high ceiling above. The fair meant a lot to me then and it still does now, even though I haven't actually attended one since Abby was a baby.

So to see my name (albeit spelled incorrectly, but that's not a big thing to me) up there... it's like I'm there and connected to those people and my family and those memories all over again. And that makes me smile.

August 12

And just like that I'm back at home, sitting in my usual perch, typing on my laptop and not my phone, reflecting on how impossibly quickly the past 19 years have gone by.

I had a late flight out of Midway, so Abby and I were able to spend a chunk of the day together before I had to leave. We visited another Mother Ship and bought toothpaste and tissues at Dollar General and had Culver's for lunch (again; oh, those delicious pretzel bites and frozen custard do so love my thighs) and took a walk around her decidedly beautiful campus. And then I sat in her desk chair and silently watched as she meticulously organized her dorm room and then laid across her bed, surrounded by a menagerie of comforting pillows and friendly stuffed animals. And we talked.

When the hour arrived she walked me down to the rental car and I gave her a big hug and when I stepped back she was crying. I was too; in fact, I sobbed as I drove away. She stood on the sidewalk and I watched her get smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror until I turned the corner and she completely disappeared from sight.

Separation is hard. But I am so grateful to know that she has a terrific group of friends who love and care for her and who can be physically present for her when I cannot. That girl of mine is growing into an amazing adult human, and I am so proud and thankful.

August 11

Today began as the past several have with me dropping Abby off at work. While she hung out in the CPO, I hit up a Mother Ship —the fourth different one of my week— and then picked up a few odds and ends she still needed. (The odds and ends are endless.) She got off at 1 and we Culvered for lunch, picked up some groceries, and Paneraed for dinner while taking in a terrible Lifetime movie at the hotel. We love our terrible Lifetime movies, so it was fabulous.

I head back home to California tomorrow evening. It’s been a good week here with my one and only girl and I know I’ll miss her, but I also know that great things are in store for her this year. And for that truth, I am grateful.

August 10

Today was mostly quiet. Abby worked and I drove around trying to avoid accidentally winding up on a toll road while engaging in light shopping. (And also wondering why on earth people drive on raised medians in Chicagoland. It's just weird, people.) 

I picked her up when she got off at 1:30 and we went to Portillo’s for lunch, because her Illinois friends were apparently all stunned she’d never been. The verdict: okay enough but pricey for what you get. They did have the supreme Logan special —chocolate cake with chocolate frosting— which makes me like them a wee bit better, but I’ve definitely had comparable food for less cash. 

From there we did some more light shopping for a few forgotten odds and ends and swung through the Sonic drive thru for some slushes since Abby was fully parched. 

The evening hours were low-key; after a jaunt back to campus to drop off some things in her room (including some truly iconic glittery pink curtains to cover her closet, since her dorm no longer has closet doors) we settled back into the hotel and ate leftover pizza for dinner. So yeah, it was quiet and fairly uneventful as far as recent days have gone. So for that quiet, I am grateful.

August 9

Abby went to work this morning —her first day at the college post office— so I did what I do and went to a new-to-me Mother Ship and (tada) a new-to-me Target. She texted me at around 11:30 to say that there wasn’t as much to do as initially anticipated, so she got off work and hung out in her dorm room until I got back into town. She’s still not feeling so hot, so we stopped at Sonic so she could get a slush to soothe her throat and then returned to the hotel to chill for a few hours.

But the big event of the day was dinner at Culver’s with her girlfriends, three of whom will be her suitemates this year. I really enjoyed spending some time with Ashley, Meredith, Michaela, and Laura, and I understand why Abby loves each of them as much as she does. (And I extra-love how Meredith comically included the absent Anna in their group photo. I just about snorted my Diet Coke when I saw it.) It does my heart good to know that they’re around to offer her support, friendship, and copious laughter as she starts the college sophomore chapter of her story.

August 8

It’s only 9:45 but I’m legit exhausted. Abby and I ran around quite a lot today: the Mother Ship (duh), her friend Meredith’s house to pick up her sheets and a few other sundries she’d left with her over the summer, Target, Walmart, another Target, Arbys for lunch, her friend Laura’s house for different items left over the summer (which morphed into a quick but very pleasant visit with Laura’s very welcoming parents --one of whom was her stats professor last semester-- too). 

Then I dropped Abby at school so she could spend some time with her good pal Jakob while I sat on a black eyed Susan-buffered bunch on campus and absorbed the temperate late-day air. (It was quite lovely out.) She then walked said-boy over to meet me and after we exchanged pleasantries (and I probably scared him with my overt extroversion), she and I headed to Giordanos for pizza. Giordanos makes a mean deep dish pie, but I was so pooped by the time we got there that Abby mused that I sounded like tipsy-mom, even though nary a drop of alcohol had touched my lips. And now we’re back at the hotel.

So that was the physical busy-ness of today. But there was also emotional business that, at times, made the hours less enjoyable then they should have been. I’m learning that it’s hard watching your child become an adult and make her own decisions, especially when I would probably do it differently. But I’m trying to let go of the vestiges of that control I once had over her life and instead trust that she will do what’s right in the eyes of God. Because ultimately, she should listen to Him before she listens to me anyhow! 

For that truth —the reality that God has a good plan for her and for all of us— I’m grateful and relieved. And I'm grateful that my girl knows that, too, because that knowledge will take her immeasurably further than I could ever imagine.

August 7

Adam and the brositos ferried Abby and I to the airport this morning. We cleared security in record time and Abby only made fun of me for wearing flip flops (my “naked dogs” was a term liberally thrown about as we sat at the gate) a few times. 

Our flight to Chicago left on time (gasp) and landed 20-plus minutes early (double gasp) and was entirely uneventful. Baggage claim was a bit slow, but even then our bags were among the first to emerge from the great luggage cavern below. The shuttle bus driver to the rental car facility was fantastic (he sang for us) and the wait time at the counter minimal, and I remarked to Abby that I felt like a giant hamster as we drove away in our Kia Soul. (I chortled over how clever I was. She didn’t get the reference, but I did later show her the old TV commercials. She was fully bewildered and mildly traumatized.) 

Following an easy and entirely uneventful drive through the Chicago ‘burbs, we arrived at our hotel in Glen Ellyn, checked in, and then hightailed it to Culver’s for some burgers and pretzel bites (which I think we’d both been dreaming about aaaaall summer) and frozen custard. They got my custard wrong both times I ordered it, but eh, I’m not going to complain about my chocolate ice cream being imperfect, especially on such a quiet travel day, because that would be akin to complaining that my diamond shoes are too tight. 

So yes: we’re here. It was a terrific day, as far as travel days go. And I am thankful.

August 6

Tomorrow morning Abby and I will board a plane and fly to Chicago so she can begin her sophomore year of college in a few weeks. (She's going back early to start her on-campus job at the college post office. Maiden of the Mail she'll be.) 

Since it's her last complete day in California for a while, she had the controls when it came to the meal plan. The result was Nations for lunch and chicken parmesan for dinner, and then we topped it all off with ice cream from Meadowlark this evening.

It's so surreal to realize that she's already a college sophomore. (And I know that later this week, it'll also be surreal when it truly sinks in that Logan should be a high school senior --that'll be a doozy-- and when Isaac starts his sophomore year of high school and Brady begins seventh grade, but she's my oldest so everything she does is in new-to-me territory as far as parenting goes.)

Anyway, I know she's not super duper thrilled to be going back because she's a bit of a homebody, but I'm confident that she'll have a great year. She's living with her best friends and I know that once she gets into the swing of things, she'll be just fine. Better than fine.

So tonight, on the eve of the next leg of her life's adventure, I'm grateful for the summer months we've had together as a family. And I'm grateful that she loves her friends and her school (even if she can't quite remember how much she loves them at the moment). And I'm grateful that she's always within God's grip, even when she's away from us. They're all beautiful, beautiful gifts.

August 5

With nothing else on the schedule this morning, Abby and I were able to take one of our famous shopping trips.

She did have a meetup with a friend planned for the early afternoon hours, though so it was an abbreviated outing --just Target, Hobby Lobby, Michaels, and Burger King for some mozzarella sticks (her) and Diet Cherry Vanilla Coke (me)-- but it was good nonetheless. 

I'll miss her when she's at school, but like I've said many times before, I'm so, so proud of who she is and who she's becoming. And I'm thankful to God for choosing me to be her mom.

August 4

I was a bit taken aback (but entirely gratified) when, at Starbucks this morning, Abby had me lean into her space so she could take a selfie of us. It's usually me who takes the photos so it was a nice surprise. 

But it was also --as she noted-- her last time at our usual Mother Ship for a while, as she heads back to Illinois for the fall semester on Monday. I'm going with her to help her settle in a bit so I'm sure we'll hit up a java joint (and definitely a Culver's) while I'm there, but there's definitely something special about the usual location.

Those little things that feel familiar and help us feel like we're at home are such blessings, even if they're just mundane, everyday things like coffee shops.

August 3

It's utterly bizarre to think that at this time next week, the boys will be back in school, and in less than a week, Abby will be back at Wheaton. In some ways it feels like summer vacation has flown by at warp speed. But I'm not thinking about all of that quite yet. Today, we celebrated what's left of summer with one of our customary brunch outings to Black Bear.

It was a typical trip for us, with Isaac and Brady each going for The Volcano (read: a stack of food), chicken and waffles for Abby, and another stop on the great menu adventure for me (since I'm known to skip around with my meal picks).

We ate and amused each other, and they all smiled on cue (before cue, really) when I pulled out my phone to take the usual selfie. 

It was very, very pleasant. And I am grateful for the time.

August 2

Last week I decided that it would be fun to take some pics with the kids before Abby heads back to Wheaton. We hadn't done it in a few years, and they change so fast these days that I wanted to capture who they are right now. But rather than having them wear the requisite "nice clothes", I told them to wear an outfit and bring props that are representative of who they are. No limits. And I told myself that no matter what they were wearing when they emerged from their rooms, I wasn't going to send them back upstairs to change.

And personally, I think they nailed it (albeit with a little help from me for the brositos). Abby wore a dress that she designed and made earlier this summer and selected her Minnie Mouse ears from our trip to Disneyland last year and a wee little action figure as her props. Brady donned a short-sleeved Pokemon sleep onesie that honors his love of video games and brought along both a Ravens beanie --since he's my little Baltimore sports fan and since he always wears a beanie during the winter months-- and his all-stars baseball cap, as well as BearBear, Chub, and a baseball bat. (Yep, he had a lot of stuff.) Isaac wore his baseball pants, belt, and socks from his Babe Ruth team along with a nice polo style shirt (since he likes to dress up). And he tucked his smallest stuffed dog --SlimeBall-- into his front pocket. (You can see him peeking out.) He also brought a baseball and his glove. And of course Lambie was there, too. He'll always be one of them.

I got in on a few images, too, but I'm using this one because it shows The Squad standing together as the little unit they are. It shows how tall they are (Brady's catching up) and how they opted to represent themselves for the camera. And how they can come together. And I love it. 

So for them and for their willingness to play along with my half-nutty idea, I'm grateful. 

August 1

When he was in the hospital, one of the only things Logan would reliably try to eat was chocolate cake with chocolate frosting.

So that's the kind of birthday cake we make for him each year: chocolate with chocolate frosting. The decorations and precision of construction may vary, but the basics remain the same.

Tonight as I looked down at the slice Adam handed me, I smiled at the memory of him licking crumbs from his lips as he mm-mm-mm'd over that cake so long ago.

For that sweet memory, I am thankful.