January 31

This is, as is the case far more often than I would like, the only pic I took today. But it works, so here it is.

It works because as Brady and I sat at the Mother Ship this morning, his friend Andrew and his mom April unexpectedly joined us for some chit-chat.

It'd been a while since I'd seen them so it was a blessing to have the opportunity to catch up a bit.

So for that unplanned time with them (and the usual planned time with Terry!), I'm grateful.

January 30

If two photos could sum up Isaac and Brady's relationship, it's probably these two.

After running down to the mailbox this afternoon, Brady wrapped his arms around Isaac's waist in an attempt to... well, I'm not sure what he'd hoped to accomplish. Isaac found the situation amusing and humored him. And then they walked back to the house like this.

And then as they turned up the driveway, they stiff-armed each other, but the stiff-arming didn't last long. No, after a few moments of faux-contention, they put their arms around one another and walked into the garage.

Like good bros.

And that's a blessing.

January 29

Isaac is something of a night owl so given that he has to be up early for school, I wasn't terribly surprised when he fell asleep on the couch this afternoon.

I watched him from afar for a while before I got up to steal a snapshot.

There's something sweet about watching my kiddos sleep. It was a sweet experience when they were babies, and it's still sweet now, even though they're well-beyond the little-kid years.

So for that blessing, I am grateful.

January 28

As 49ers Quarterback Brock Purdy appeared on the TV screen to deliver his post-game remarks after winning the NFC Championship this evening, I turned to Isaac and, said --in my most pointed mom-voice-- "that is why you don't let yourself get discouraged and never give up."

This very dear son of mine has felt a great deal of discouragement of late over the upcoming spring baseball season. He's worried he won't make the team and has lamented that he doesn't "have a personality" when compared to the other guys. (That last bit left me completely dumbfounded because is truly one of the nicest people I know. I don't know why he thinks he doesn't have a personality.) I don't know how to help him. 

But I figured maybe Brock Purdy could.

If you don't follow football, I'll give you some background 4-1-1. Purdy earned the unenviable title of Mr. Irrelevant when he was the last man taken during his draft year. (The literal last draft pick.) He wound up being thrust into the spotlight rather abruptly when the Niners' starter and second stringer both went down with injuries. This year, he was named the official starter. And he played extremely well, but his efforts were never good enough for many members of the media, who seemed unable or maybe just unwilling to admit that maybe --just maybe-- he was a better player than they'd guessed. 

But he persevered. He gave the glory to God and pressed onward. And now this guy who was once tagged as being irrelevant --unimportant, not a factor, disposable-- is going to the Superbowl at just 23 years of age. At quarterback!

He could've succumbed to discouragement at any time --because many of us certainly would-- but he didn't. He could've stopped praising God at any time, but he didn't. He just kept persevering. 

And my prayer is that my boys will see that example and that it will inspire them to just keep going, because with God, anything at all is possible.

January 27

"Saturday morning" has historically meant a lot of different things to me. When I was very young, it meant Cartoons (Amazing, wonderful cartoons) and the sound of Garbage Cans Clanking By The SIde Of The House. When I was a teenager, it meant Teaching Dance Class. When I was a newlywed, it meant Farmer's Market and Downtowns Strolls. And then it meant Taking Dance Class With Abby and Baseball With The Bros. (And much of the time even now, it still means Baseball.) And some weekends, it means Prayer Shawl.

Today was a Prayer Shawl Saturday.

I so love meeting with my group of ladies. They're all a bit older than me, but I so appreciate their wisdom and their care (and truthfully, their compliments for my work, including the blue/teal piece near the bottom of the image. It's wonderful to feel like my efforts are seen and valued).

My time with all of them is a blessing.

January 26

Nikki and I went to the mall this morning.

I looked like a goon (because our original plan was to walk the Sports Park so I was dressed accordingly) and spent too much (on all sorts of things, but most notably a lovely flannel shirt for Adam, a dress that I saw on a wall from a distance and just knew would be perfect, and a Hello Kitty dressed as Cheer Bear) but it was so, so fun. We walked all over the place, drank smoothies, went into stores I never visit, laughed, and caught up on life's latest happenings.

I love this girl and I'm so glad we're still friends! Relationships like ours are among life's sweetest gifts.

January 25

The moon shone through the second-story window as I walked into the family room this evening after cleaning up the dinner dishes. (I showed Isaac how to make homemade mac and cheese, for the record. At his request.)

I stopped abruptly at the sight because it was just so bright. And then I remembered that it was the first full moon of 2024. 

I don't think about the moon all that often, but when I do, I'm struck by the sheer magnitude of the universe. I'm endlessly impressed and awed by God's far-reaching, unbounded creativity. 

And at the same time, I'm humbled to realize that in addition to the sky and the moon, he also saw fit to create little bitty me. I matter to Him. And so do you.

January 24

When I got up this morning, heavy rain was pummeling the roof over my head.

I padded out to the dining room window to take a look at the water level in the pool. It was high, but hadn't overflowed out onto the patio. (It's only done that once and it looked crazy when it did, so I always look out for a repeat of the weirdness.)

And as I always do when it rains, I chuckled to myself and thanked God for the free pool water. 

It's a basic thing, but it's a blessing.

January 23

It's Tuesday so Adam and I enjoyed our usual dinner out while the boys were at church.

We sat and talked about our respective weeks thus far while we waited for our food. The restaurant was buzzy-bee busy so we had ample time to catch up.

At one point, as I sipped my prosecco, I suggested we take a pic in Abby's favorite style, so here it is. I have no idea why, but she often takes photos of herself from this particular angle so I figured we'd give it a shot. 

It's kind of ridiculous, but humor is a good thing. And a blessing. So I'm grateful for the smiles.

January 22

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror for a minute this morning, silently mulling the sad truth that I haven't made a concerted effort to pray very often of late. And then I released a reticent sigh and got on with my day.

And then this afternoon, as Brady and I waited in the car for Isaac after school, I suddenly tuned in to the words of this song as it played on the radio. I hadn't heard it before, but the lyrics were striking. And I recalled my morning revelation.

And I was instantly convicted that I need to get back into my prayer routine. 

Praying for something doesn't guarantee an outcome that I'll like or want, but it does make me more accepting of whatever does happen because it brings me closer to God. And for that, I am thankful.

January 21

I think Isaac and Brady got their fill of NFL action yesterday because they spent most of today hanging out together.

They played video games, threw around a football in the yard, talked in extremely loud voices, and wrestled. 

And they seemed to thoroughly enjoy their uninterrupted time together.

Sibling relationships aren't always easy or pleasant, but I'm so thankful that Isaac and Brady love and appreciate one another as much as they do. They don't get along 24/7, of course, because none of us do, but their relationship is a good one. And it's a blessing for them to experience that bond and for me to see it.

January 20

It's a fact of this human life that sometimes your team wins and sometimes they lose. 

But today was especially nice because both of our teams won.

Then Ravens were up first. Although the first half was a bit rocky and they entered halftime knotted in a 10-10 tie with the Texans, they surged in the second half and wound up winning handily.

The 49ers match-up against the Packers this evening was a bit more dicey. Adam's parents came over (with pizza) to join us for the game, and it was a nail-biter. It was pouring down rain in Santa Clara and both teams seemed to have issues, but the Niners looked particularly bad. But they persevered, and wound up winning thanks to a very late-game interception that put an abrupt end to the Packers' final drive.

It was stressful. But it was also fun to sit and watch the games with my people. I'm glad that both of our teams won because ultimately, you want your teams to come out on top. But I'm more grateful for the time with my people, because at the very end of the day, that's what matters more.

January 19

Back in the early '80s when I was still quite small, I remember poring over the Sears toy catalog while perched in a barstool at the kitchen counter. I gazed at Strawberry Shortcake and GI-Joe and Matchbox Cars and the Transformers. And I remember staring extra-fixedly at the page that featured the Care Bears; Cheer Bear in particular, with her pink fur and bright rainbow tummy symbol, caught my eye.

Fortunately for wee me my mom got the hint and a Cheer Bear (and eventually, several others) came to live at our house. 

I hadn't really thought about the Care Bears for years until I saw new ones during a trip to the Miniso store at the mall a few months ago. I've picked up a few of them since that day (including a fresh pink Cheer Bear, of course), but this guy --Grumpy Bear-- is my newest acquisition. I can totally relate to him and to the notion that not every day is a sunny one. And that it's okay to have non-sunny days because they're part of this life.

Nostalgic feelings are a blessing, so I'm grateful for the happy memories this guy and his stuffie pals provide.

January 18

We had Chinese takeout for dinner this evening.

After plating his egg rolls and chicken chow mein and fried rice, Isaac started toward the silverware drawer to get a fork but stopped short and reached for chopsticks instead.

He'd never used them before, but wanted to try them out. And he wound up doing remarkably well. (Better than I can do, anyway.)

I'm grateful for him and for this ever-growing 15-year old of mine and for his willingness to try new things. (Even simple ones like different utensils at dinner). That kind of adaptability is a blessing and will continue to be one for him down the line.

January 17

There's a homeless guy who hangs out at the Mother Ship. I know his name and chit-chat with him sometimes while I'm waiting in line. To protect his privacy, I'll just call him J.

When Brady and I got there this morning for our customary Wednesday pre-school date, J was sitting there at one of the little tables with a cup of coffee. He was hunched over reading something, and I said hi on my way to the register. After I sat down, I realized I'd left my food in the car, so I went out to get it and with J in mind, I decided to bring in an entire box.

I pulled one out for myself and then two for J, and then went over to his table and asked if he liked peanut butter. He smiled and said "oh, yes!" and accepted the two bars. I returned to my chair and, while exchanging the usual witty repartee, watched as J ate both of them in quick succession. So I got up and gave him the rest of the box, which he accepted gratefully and then proceeded to down with great efficiency

He was hungry. Really hungry. 

The truth stung as it sunk in: a guy that I see just about every weekday was so hungry that he wolfed down four biscuits in record time. Four biscuits that I bought last week and left in my car because I forgot I had them. I can do better than that. I should do better.

But today, I'm thankful that I felt compelled to do something. Because as Jesus said, when we do something for someone who can't pay us back, we're doing it for Him. And I want to do whatever I can for Him.

January 16

As is our recent custom, Adam and I went to dinner tonight while the boys were at church.

It was a rainy evening but we were blessed with a parking spot very close the restaurant. I switched up my usual pick from this particular establishment by  opting for the chicken parmesan, and it did not disappoint! 

Also not a let-down was the conversation I shared with my hunny. He did most of the talking (since I didn't have much to share) and I got to hear quite a lot about what's going on at work and how he feels about it.

It was a great night out, and I am thankful for it.

January 15

Adam gave me these roses for my birthday last week.

In my mind, they're a wonder for a few reasons. First off, they're a vibrant, beautiful shade of pink. The photo doesn't do the color justice. Secondly, they're probably the most fragrant flowers I've even received. The scent is strong and amazing and it doesn't make my nose itch one bit. And finally, they exist! Roses aren't exactly in season at the moment so the fact that they're as full and lush and perfect as they are is impressive. They're certainly some of God's best work when it comes to flowers.

So today, I'm grateful for my hunny's sweet gift. And for the beauty that roses bring to my life.

January 14

I know I used a sky shot a few days ago, but I have another one today.

I had joint Session (Elders' board) and financial committee meeting at church this afternoon. And going in, I wasn't thrilled about the prospect of spending two hours of my Sunday talking about church finances. I'm embarrassed to admit it, but my attitude could've been much better.

I recognized the hardness of my own heart, so before I went in, I prayed for a productive meeting of the minds. And of course, that's just how it panned out. I took in some really great feedback from a few people and feel like I better understand where we are and where we need to be (although I'm not sure how to get there. Yet). 

And then as I drove up the hill toward home (where I caught the second half of the very satisfying shellacking of the Dallas Cowboys in an NFC playoff game), a strikingly beautiful sky spread out before me. And it felt like grace. Despite my poor attitude --which by human standards "deserved" dingy rainclouds against a dingier dull gray backdrop-- God still let me see this view, because that's what He does: He gives me better than I deserve. That's grace. And I am grateful for it.

January 13

Isaac and Brady are almost always doing something weird that I can't quite explain.

For example, this is what I saw when I turned to wash my plate after dinner this evening: Brady standing on Isaac's back while scrubbing his dish in the sink. (The dishwasher is currently kaput. As are half of the burners on the stove. It's bonanza time for broken appliances at our house. But I digress.) Even more bizarre, as I looked on, Isaac asked Brady to shift to the left a bit.

Yep, weird. But once I confirmed that no one was in danger or being harmed, it was also funny. I think God has a solid sense of humor, and this was a good reminder of that truth. So for the continuous IV of humor that runs through our house because of their antics, I'm grateful.

January 12

This is what the sky looked like as I sat parked in the pickup line at the middle school this afternoon.

That panoramic scene stretched as far as I could see and was so varied and complex in design and composition --dark and light and diffuse and dense all at once-- that I couldn't help but stare up at it in wonder.

God creates the most amazing artwork, and I am grateful to be able to see such natural beauty on a regular, run of the mill day like this one.

January 11

I had a quiet 46th birthday. It's a busy time for Adam at work so I took the boys to school and then went to the Mother Ship, where I opted to use my birthday reward on an oat milk pistachio latte. (The verdict: tasty but not worth the $7.15 it would've cost me had it not been free.) Then I drove over to Walmart and Target to look for new cars. I didn't find any I didn't already have, but I smiled to myself when I turned down the Hot Wheels aisle and immediately spotted two Corvettes on the pegs and another sitting on the shelf. It was like a timely 'hi Mom' from my sweet Logan. I miss him a little extra on my birthday.

Later in the day, after I picked the boys up from school and Adam finished work, we went to dinner at Mexico Lindo. Isaac decided it would be a good time to experiment with some of the filters on his phone, and I laughed heartily at some of the results. We all did. 

Then we returned home, where we video-called Abby so she could watch while I opened my presents and cut the cake. I almost always opt for some combination of chocolate and peanut butter but switched it up this year by going with lemon frosting on white cake. And as always, Adam used the correct number of candles, so it was like facing --and trying to single-handedly extinguish-- an inferno. (And I almost did it with one attempt! Just a single stubborn candle stayed lit.)

So that was my day. I had a hard time choosing a photo, but ultimately went with this one of us from dinner because it's genuine. I love these people (and I love Abby and Logan too, even though they weren't here with me physically). They're my people. And they make every year that passes an adventure worth remembering and treasuring and, well, living. 

So today I'm thankful to add another candle to my cake.

January 10

It's weird: my birthday is tomorrow, but it doesn't feel like my birthday is tomorrow, if that makes sense. It's like I'm finding myself a little caught off guard that it's almost here; a la "oh no, I haven't reflected yet!" So I guess I should do that so I can sleep.

Overall, 45 has been pretty good to me. I certainly don't look any younger, but I feel more settled than Perpetually Rattled Younger Me ever expected to feel. And given the level of anxiety that was my norm for a very long time, that prevailing sense of peace is no small blessing.

I didn't go out with friends as much as I once did this past year and in fact, my circle got quite a bit smaller, partly by choice and partly by happenstance. And along with those evenings out went most of my desire to wear makeup. But I did begin going on Tuesday Night Dates with my most important friend --my hunny-- a few times a month. (He prefers fresh-faced me to made-up me,  so he's cool with me ditching the eyeliner.) And that time to connect and re-connect with him has been a blessing.

I also enjoyed the daily gift of watching three of my four kiddos continue to grow and change and mature. I got to take shopping trips with Abby and watch my boys play baseball. And, of course, I got to have Wednesday morning Starbucks hang-outs with the guy in the photo, too (who is, for the record, now just a hair shorter than me. It won't be long until I am the Official Family Shorty). And although he's not with me, I got to continue to remember the precious gift that was Logan's life. Sometimes it's as if I can feel his fingerprints on my heart. And there's a sweetness to that feeling that can't be captured with anything less than wordless, inaudible motions of the heart.

So yes, my birthday is tomorrow. I've never been one to worry much about my age or grey hair, so I'm ready for it to come. And I'm grateful to God for the start of another new year.

January 9

Isaac and Brady had Youth Group tonight, so after we dropped them off at church, Adam and I went to dinner at Cattlemen's.

As I sat there at our high-top table by the bar sipping a glass of prosecco and listening to him talk about his day, I felt a profound sense of satisfaction. The flavors of the food, the conversation, the gift of being one-on-one with The One I chose all those years ago enjoying some down time as familiar old(ish) country tunes played in the background... it was all so sweet. So comfortable. So familiar.

And I am thankful for every bit of it.

January 8

It was a quiet day at the Wight house. And that quiet day transformed into an equally quiet evening that's featured a screening of the College Football National Championship Game and Chick-fil-A in front of the TV.

We're all settled beneath our own respective blankets, too, which provide a measure of warmth on what's turned out to be a rather chilly night. (Sorry, Abby. I know 47 degrees doesn't compare to the tundra that is Wheaton at the moment.)

I looked over at Brady a few minutes ago. He's huddled underneath a giant granny square afghan that I made a few years ago. And the sight made me smile. Not only is he my cutie baby, but I love it when my people use the things that I've made for them. It makes me feel accomplished. So for that feeling and for blankets when it's cold and for this youngest kiddo of mine, I am grateful.

January 7

We all arose early this morning and piled into the car to drive Abby to the airport for her return flight to Chicago. We all didn't have to go, but there was no question that we would. It's what we do.

Although the ride was quiet and quick, the Southwest terminal was a zoo, with lines going every which way and luggage-toting people spilling from cracks in the sidewalk. (Not really. But it sure seemed that way.)

There were hugs for all. Adam sought out clarification from an employee about which line Abby needed to join, was given the (wrong) information, accompanied her to the rear of said (wrong) line, and then we were off.

And then after successfully tagging and checking her bags and clearing security, my girl was off, too. Off on an airplane to begin her fourth semester of college.

I'll miss our shopping trips and random chit-chats, but I'm so proud of her and I'm so grateful that she goes to a school where she has friends who love on her like she's their biological sister. To know that she's well-cared for when we're not with her is a huge blessing.

January 6

Tomorrow morning we'll take Abby to the airport so she can wing her way back to Wheaton for the Spring semester. 

It's been really nice having her home for the past three-plus weeks and I'll be sad when she's gone again, so we did fun things today: we watched two movies (Logan in the early afternoon and Super Mario Bros. tonight), played a round of Farkle, and went to dinner at The Cheesecake Factory.

My girl is something of a homebody so she's not entirely thrilled to be heading back to Chicago, but I'm excited for her to get back to her friends and to her room that's all her own. And I'm excited to see her continue to grow and become more independent. She's an exceptional human. And I am so blessed to call her my daughter.

January 5

Abby heads back to school on Sunday. So today, we took our last shopping trip of the season, which featured stops at the usual haunts plus lunch from In-N-Out since she wasn't feeling well enough to eat hers when Adam brought it home for dinner a few days ago.

It was a really fun trip until it wasn't. I won't rehash anything because it won't help, but here's where I wax (yep, just "wax" and not "wax poetic") a bit. Sometimes, I feel like I'm a less than awesome parent. A lot of times, actually. I get frustrated and don't control my emotions as well as I probably could at times. I'm better at that than I used to be --I think Adam would attest to that-- but I'm still not great. I'm not as patient as I should be. And I worry that in some ways, I'm just a bad example. I mean, I yell (and sometimes use creative language) in traffic and don't immediately (or in some cases ever) put my phone down when one of the kids shows up and starts talking to me. My mouth is often ahead of my brain. I get distracted by squirrels running by the window. I wish I were... better. More put together. More... healed, I guess.

But in spite of me, our children are still shaping into really, really good people, and I know that's entirely because of God's intervention in their lives. So today, I'm grateful that God is infinitely better than I am and that He's always working to transform me into who I should be. And I'm grateful to have had Abby here for the past several weeks, because she is one of the greatest blessings I've ever received.

January 4

I was at Safeway this morning picking up some milk and other sundries when I spied my friend Kim wheeling a cart down the cereal aisle. I hadn't seen her in a while so we pulled our buggies (look at me gettin' all fancy) to the side and had a nice chat by the syrup and pancake mix.

I won't go into the nitty gritty, but at some point during the conversation, she smiled and said "I think God intended for me to run into you today." I agreed.

We finished our catch-up session and as I headed to the dairy case (because it would be just like me to forget the milk), I pondered her words. 

It's amazing how God works if you're open to seeing Him in action. He works through situations and circumstances, of course. But He also works through us; through me and Kim and yes, even you. 

So as we continue waddling into this new year, keep your eyes open so you notice when God uses you to bless someone else. And then thank Him for the opportunity to be that blessing.

January 3

I didn't feel great when I woke up this morning so I spent much of the day crocheting and watching random shows on TV.

And then this evening, when I got up and stood by the window to watch the boys loading their gear into Adam's car for a trip to the park, I saw the sky and was once again awed by its complex beauty.

Heavy clouds, fluffy clouds. Blue sky, darker sky. And the bright, nearly pure whiteness of the sunbeams as they stretched from behind the clouds to the earth far below.

I've said this so many times before, but it's still true so I'll repeat myself: God makes the most beautiful art there is. And for that loveliness and how it fills me with a sense of awe when I take it in, I am thankful.

January 2

It was a mostly quiet day-after-New Year's, with some shopping for Abby and me (because she needed more fabric to continue work on a dress she's making) and a lot of time hanging around the house.

In addition to our retail exploits, another highlight of the day was playing a dice game Isaac got for Christmas. It seemed complicated from the outset, but once we'd played a round, we got the hang of it. 

It was really nice to play a new game with my peeps (except Abby, who was feeling a bit under the weather by the time the evening rolled around). So for the gift of those precious moments, I am grateful.

January 1

Happy New Year!

We rang in 2024 as a family with a replay of the NYC ball drop and the clinking of wine glasses filled with Martinelli's for all of them, and prosecco for me. And there was a kiss, of course, for Adam and me.

It's not a year that's slated to hold a lot of adventures, but we'll see what God has in store for us. When you walk with Him, you never really know what's going to come your way! And that truth, as scary as it can seem at times, is a blessing.