July 31

Today is Logan's 14th birthday. It's almost impossible to believe it, since we didn't get to see him at 6 or 7 or 10 or 13, but birthdays have this way of repeating themselves every single year, so here we are yet again. It was a pleasant enough day, with cool-for-summer weather, blue skies, carry-out Outback Steakhouse for lunch (with, naturally, his favorite brown bread), old home videos, a new car for his grave, a viewing of Cars 2, spaghetti and meatballs for dinner, and chocolate cake with chocolate frosting decorated by his siblings, who finished their work and then launched into a spontaneous dance party. It was a good day that brought back good memories, even if they are always tinged with sadness and what-ifs.

With all of that said, I'll close with a little tale from the day. I saw a gangly-legged boy sitting at a table with a girl and a woman as I left the Mother Ship this morning. My gaze probably lingered slightly too long on his not-quite-child, not-quite-man face and I wanted so badly to pause for a moment to ask his age, but I stopped myself because the act seemed too strange. I worried I'd come off as some weirdo rather than what I am: a mom trying desperately to picture her son at an age he'll never "be" in this life. But I kind of wish I'd gotten over my fears and asked, because truthfully, if I had to guess, I'd say this boy was 14. And had I asked, I'd have had the chance to respond with "hey, my oldest son is 14, too. Today is his birthday." Because although he wasn't here with us for long, he made a huge impression, and I am beyond proud that God chose me to be his mom. And I want others to know who he was and still is, even if new people don't get the chance to meet him in person, because he was everything love and life and energy and ebullience.

Happy, happy birthday, Logan.

July 30

Ah, these three people and their ever-growing minds and collective imagination.

I was sitting at the table with them earlier half-listening as Abby outlined the pictured animals' back stories (while speaking as BearBear, of course). I snapped to full attention as she talked about the accepted monetary unit of Bearlandia (and I'd share it but honestly, it's incredibly bizarre) and, horrified, asked for an explanation. And then they all laughed and rolled their eyes and told me that said-items had always been the accepted currency in Bearlandia.

Yeah. It's a weird story. A very weird story. But their weirdness brings me joy sometimes. And for that, I'm thankful.

July 29

Logan's 14th birthday is in two days. I'm not really ready for it, but I suppose I never really am so that's neither here nor there. But I was thinking about it earlier today as I drove over to the Mother Ship to pick up my iced coffee en route to the old house (where I had lots of garage-boxes to empty and sort). I wasn't exactly surprised to find Abby and Gracie sitting out in front of the Coldstone next door (since that was their planned destination), but seeing them there did send my mind on a tangent.

Although no one else will ever fill the place that Logan holds in the inner regions of Abby's heart, I am so happy that she has Gracie. I'm happy that they can sing show tune after show tune and talk for hours about nothing at all, and I love that they can count on each other when they need emotional support. (Even when they may not realize they need it.) And I'm happy that they "get" each other like they do.

We all need Those People in our lives, and I feel blessed that these two are so often blessed with --and by-- each other.

July 28

I just decided that I don't spend enough time on the patio. It has nothing to do with today's entry; just an observation. Onward. Abby announced this morning that she'd found a recipe for cheesecake bites that she wanted to try out. Since I like cheesecake, she's generally proven to be a good (read: successful) baker, and I'm not insane, I bought her the small list of items she needed to make it happen. So that's what she's doing right now (in our 80-some degree kitchen. Advantage: patio when it comes to evening temps at the Wight House.)

I appreciate that she likes to bake and that she trolls the interwebs looking for recipes to try out. Now that's partly because I'm a willing consumer of the yummies shes makes, but it's also because I think it shows good initiative on her part. She's not generally the first person to jump up to volunteer and she's definitely not the first person to speak up in a crowd, but when she feels a passion for something, it shows. So I'm thankful for the things that make her happy and motivate her to act and do more.

July 27

As I've noted before (multiple times, probably), the whole shelter-in-place thing that's taken over 2020 has left me feeling a bit isolated. So I was happy to have Nikki over for a brief visit this evening.

We just sat out back at the table (like Kristine and I are wont to do of late) and spent a little time catching up.

I hadn't seen her since March, so the face-time was good for me. And for that, I'm thankful.

July 26

I finished up my fourth puzzle of the month yesterday and was about to start on number five this afternoon when I had a radical idea: why not invite Adam to help? (I'm very much a me-do-it'er when it comes to puzzles. I have no idea why. Just am.) So he joined me in the dining room, dumped all 1,000 pieces of Baltimore on the table, and started sorting. And I cringed.

Why? Because that's. Not. How. I. Do. Puzzles. I de-bag the pieces and then carefully pour them into the bottom half of the box. Then I sort though said pieces, find edges, and assemble those first. Adam, however, likes to lay them all out and turn them all face-up. He finds some edge pieces, but not all of them. And he finds notable objects --in this case, words-- to put together first.

So yeah, I sat in silent annoyance as I watched him piece together one word and then another, but at some point, I realized a truth: we're still working together. We have different strategies and different ways of going about the task, but in the end, the picture will be the same regardless of whether we do it my way or his way or a combination of both. And on top of that, the world would be a dull place if we all did everything in exactly the same way. So today, I'm thankful for our differences and for how we can pull together in spite of them --or even, in some cases-- because of them.

July 25

One of the many (many) bummers of COVID was the cancellation of the girls' annual dance recital and their annual dance pics. Fortunately, Abby and Gracie chose to humor Angela and me today when they agreed to don their costumes and do their make-up so the mamarazzi could capture some memories anyway.

After the girls' session, they thought it would be a great idea for the moms to don our sign-of-the-times masks and mimic one of their poses, so since fair is fair, we complied. So that's what we have here: the high schoolers on top, and the moms on the bottom.

It was a brief meet-up (because dude, the sun was intense today) but a great one nonetheless. I feel so blessed to know that Gracie is there for Abby and vice versa, and like Angela, I adore the photos we've taken of the two of them over the years, so I am super-duper thankful that they let today happen.

July 24

I've had Kristine over to chat in our backyard several times and I had her over again this morning, but this time was a little different because her birthday is tomorrow. So we celebrated with coffee and lemon bundt cakes from Nothing Bundt Cakes. (So, so good, for the record.)

I choose my good friends rather carefully, and I'm so grateful to have had her in my life for the past 24 years. (Oh, wow. Twenty-four years.) We haven't been in consistent communication over that entire span of time and Heaven knows we don't agree on everything, but we can always have peaceful, respectful conversations. And I can always count on her to lend an ear if I need one.

So for all of those not-small blessings that are encompassed within having her as a friend, I'm grateful.

July 23

This is, by far, the messiest communal room in our house at day's end.

But it's also the room that plays host to the most unencumbered joy -- the most shouting, the most laughter, and the most deliberate togetherness. So even though it's currently far from the "nice" living room of my imagination, I'm thankful for what this space is right now: a place for the kiddos to interact and play and grow together.

July 22

I needed some docs notarized, so I met up with my friend Heidi at a local Mother Ship this afternoon.

After we took care of business, we sat and chatted for a while. (And didn't touch our drinks. The whole mask-thing can definitely be a bummer and I think it's the first time I've ever "met for coffee" and not had any!) Given how much time I've spent at home and how limited my interactions with others have been, those minutes were big blessings to my social little heart.

July 21

Isaac had a socially distanced "gathering" this evening with some of his fellow middle schoolers at church, hosted by the wonderful children's ministry director, Tina.

It was a small group, so the four of them sat in a big circle and chatted while they ate their brown bagged dinners. I caught a few glimpses of them as I circled the park before heading back home, and the scene made me smile.

Tina is a hard worker. We've known her for a number of years now and have never doubted her dedication to caring for and sharing the Gospel with our kids. She probably doesn't get much notice for all that she does, so today I just wanted to express gratitude for her and to her for all she does.

July 20

Abby and I went to Hobby Lobby this afternoon.

She wanted to try her hand at sewing a particular item, but we couldn't find the right fabric or elastic so she abandoned ship. And we emerged from the store with a few other items instead: kitchen towels, a picture for the first floor bathroom, two puzzles (including a BearBear-approved chicken-themed gem that caught her eye), throw pillows, and pillow covers.

It was a lovely trip with lots of amusing conversation that resulted in purchases that are both useful and decidedly memorable (like my gold sequined throw pillows. Score!). So for the time, I'm grateful.

July 19

The kiddos were extra rambunctious at lunchtime today, so after I finished my own food, I hightailed it to my room to put away some laundry. When I came back 15 or so minutes later, they were still seated together at the table. And they were laughing and having a grand old time. My heart surged happily at the sight, so I grabbed my phone to take a pic and they all put on their biggest cheesers for me:

When I remarked that it was so lovely to see them all getting along and having a good time together, Abby replied "we're besties. Quarantine besties." (Or something like that. She'll probably say I'm misremembering, but that was the gist of the comment.)

I love it. I just love it. I wanted kids who would be one anothers' friends, and I'm so thankful for the days --the hours, the moments, even-- during which that seems to be the case.

July 18

One of the more disappointing side effects of the pandemic has been the toll it's taken on baseball. The Spring Little League season was, of course, canceled, and the clinic the boys use was closed for several months. On the bright side of life, Isaac is part of a newly-formed 11U team, but even that has had its share of issues. Although the coach is amazing and has worked hard to be in compliance with local regulations, it's proven very difficult to set up and actually play scrimmages --much less actual games-- with other teams. Isaac (and I'm guessing virtually all of his teammates) were crestfallen when, on the heels of news that teams from other cities had been using our fields without permission, the city canceled their scrimmage against a different team at the last minute yesterday afternoon. I hated telling him that it was (again) a no-go. And he hated hearing it; in fact, he later lamented to Adam that he was worried he'd never get to play a real game.

But fortunately, as Psalm 30:5 says, joy came in the morning: he got up, suited up, and headed out to the Sports Park to take part in a last-minute intersquad scrimmage. (His coach added it to the calendar; I do love how he always tries to make lemonade out of the tree's-worth of lemons they've been handed recently.)

Isaac's half of the team was hammered pretty badly, but I know he didn't care. He was thrilled to be playing. Thrilled to be out there chatting with the other boys and thrilled to be in his baseball garb and thrilled to be really, really dirty when he got in the car to go home. In fact, he kept remarking on how delightfully dirty he was. And dusty, dirty grossness aside, I loved the enthusiasm.

So today, I'm grateful that although there's been plenty of disappointment of late, there have been "joy in the morning" moments, too.

July 17

I love many things about my house, and one of those things is the evening view from our bedroom window.

It's lovely and serene and calming to me. And the space in front of the window is a restful place to sit and reflect and pray. So for that small thing that means quite a lot when my soul needs respite, I'm grateful.

July 16

Abby started asking for a unicorn pool floatie shortly after we moved, so when I saw one today at Michael's, I bought it. She was off having a socially distanced visit with Adam's mom this afternoon, but Isaac and Brady were eager to inflate it and try it out when I got home. (Which probably had something to do with the fact that it features a built-in water gun, but I digress.)

I looked out at the deck at one point and saw them huddled together, huffing and puffing away at their task, and my heart panged audibly. (Well, not really. But it felt audible.) I so love it when they work cooperatively like this. It gives me hope for their generation. And that's a big deal to me.

July 15

I did as is my custom and skittered around the Sports Park loop this afternoon during the early part of Isaac's baseball practice. I'd planned to listen to music as I strolled but my ear buds didn't comply, so I walked in silence. I was initially grumbly over my quiet trek, but then something unexpected happened.

I heard the sweet sound of someone whistling a tune. I looked around for a few moments until I realized that the music was coming from the woman walking toward me. (You can kind of see her in the image if you squint.) She was older and hunched over and walking clearly took a great deal of effort, but she whistled a happy song anyway. And when I passed her, she turned her head to the side and smiled a hello in my direction before continuing on with her song.

It was such a lovely reminder to find joy in anything and everything, no matter what my circumstances may be at a given moment. And for that, I'm thankful.

July 14

I was bustling around a bit this morning so when Brady asked for a bagel, I rather absent-mindedly told him to ask Isaac for help. So he did just that, and when I came back to the kitchen about 20 minutes later, I found the two of them eating bagels and playing a video game.

When I thanked Isaac for helping out, he replied with a cheerful "you're welcome!"

I love it when my kids are willing to serve one another. They definitely don't comply with requests every time they're asked, but when they do, it makes my heart happy, because serving one another is an essential component of this life.

July 13

It was a pleasant, calm day. Kristine came over for coffee (yeah!) and we had a good time chit-chatting for a few hours in the back yard by the pool. Then I worked on my puzzle (which is still not quite finished) and am now engaged in our typical evening activity: binge-watching a TV show in the family room.

We have comfortable couches in our comfortable room, the crickets are chirping outside, it's cool enough out for open windows, and we're enjoying our ongoing viewing of "Designated Survivor."

It's a good, simple thing, and I'm thankful.

July 12

That cup of shave ice in Brady's hand looks innocent enough, but it housed a whole lot of verging on truly criminal flavor cacophony.

Bubblegum, root beer, and watermelon. That was his first pick. (The next time he substituted the watermelon for banana, in my memory doesn't fail me.) Although the very thought of the combination made my stomach lurch a bit, he happily scarfed down the entire serving and proclaimed it delicious. And, though it still grosses me out, I'm glad he said that, because it served as an important reminder for me: we're all fearfully and wonderfully made, and we're fearfully and wonderfully made with different preferences and likes and dislikes. And that's okay, because this life truly does requires all kinds of people to be... well, wonderful.

July 11

Every now and then, I enter puzzle-solver mode. I finished one (all cars, initially purchased with Logan in mind) in less than a day last week, so I started this one. It's proving to be significantly more challenging than the first.

It has double the number of pieces and many of said pieces are exactly the same colors, so it's taken a great deal of time and patience to get as far as I have. But I'm enjoying the challenge. I'm enjoying listening to music while I work, and I'm enjoying reflecting on how working on a puzzle can mimic life. Sometimes we try to jam pieces into places where they just don't belong. Sometimes we think we have the piece in the right place, only to find out a little later that oops, the edges don't quite line up. And sometimes we spend entire sessions fitting no pieces together at all.

But the great thing is that eventually, after much trial and error (and honestly, more than a few frustrated prayers), the pieces all do come together to make a lovely picture.

July 10

I was driving Isaac to baseball practice this evening when I heard the opening bars of a familiar tune on the radio. It was a song from a CD I had way back in high school, and I listened to said CD a lot at the time, but it hasn't been out of the CD case for probably 15 years. (Because dude, who uses actual CDs anymore?)

Anyway, I got super excited when I checked the dash and saw the song name and that old familiar CD cover and started singing along and car-dancing in my seat.

Isaac probably thought I was nuts, but those songs I listened to way back when --back when my faith was in a younger, more immature and untested place-- are so dear to me now. I'm not really sure why, but they are. So tonight, I'm thankful for that unexpected throwback from the past.

July 9

When the bickering started early this afternoon and just. Kept. Going, I straightened my Mom Hat and told the kiddos they were all going to change into their suits and get in the pool. (I know. I'm so mean.)

After minimal grousing (because again, I'm so mean), they trooped to the backyard with a selection of stuffed animals in tow and spent a few hours splashing, swimming, and soaking up some sun.

I couldn't be more grateful that we moved here when we did because I'm sure I would've blown my top if we were still at our old house, where I couldn't just send them outside en masse for a few hours. God's timing and provision are pretty amazing things.

July 8

Since Adam is working from home, we've gotten into a routine that involves me dropping Isaac off for baseball practice and Adam picking him up when it ends two hours later. I enjoy a good stroll around the Sports Park and then some chit-chat with other moms while there, but limiting my time outside helps keep my allergies at bay so I typically head home after an hour. But since it's quarterly close time, today I walked, plopped down in the grass, and watched the entire practice.

I know I said this a few weeks ago on his birthday, but I'm amazed by how much this kid has grown up this year. I'm dumbfounded that my chunkamuffin who weighed 20 pounds at six months of age is now a tall, string bean-thin almost-teenager who has complex thoughts and asks questions that make me think.

It's a wonderful thing and a huge, huge blessing but it's also just... wow. Just wow. Creation is amazing. (Oh, and he's wearing cleats in the pic. He's catching up to me, but still has two inches to go!)

July 7

We had our first in-house visitor today! I've been looking forward to hosting people ever since we made the offer on our house so I was more than ready. After I floated the idea last week, Kristine came over this morning, took a quick tour (wearing a mask, of course), and then we headed out to the back yard for some coffee and treats.

It was so, so, so (so) good to see her in person. It was so good to sit at the same table (a good eight feet apart, naturally) and enjoy coffee and catch up. (It was even good to watch a lizard stalk unsuspecting ladybugs.) It was so good, in fact, that she's planning to come back again next week so we can enjoy the good all over again.

I'm thankful to have had her in my life for the past 24 years and thankful that she lives here in town. That's a big ol' double blessing for me.

July 6

I noticed aphids on my poor little lima bean plants a few days ago. Those harmless-looking bugs suck the juice out of plants, which slowly kills them over time. I like to keep what I grow pesticide-free, so this afternoon I swung by a local garden center and picked up a natural remedy: a bag of ladybugs.

It's not the first time I've used ladybugs for pest control, and though it sounds weird, it's super satisfying to watch them munch away at their prey. So this evening, I'm grateful for natural remedies that work and keep food a little cleaner.

July 5

Yep, that's Brady eating a popsicle in our kitchen. And I'm loving it.

We weren't particularly good about limiting food consumption to specific rooms at our old house, so I lowered the boom when we got here: food and drinks are allowed only in the kitchen/kitchen nook and the dining room (when we're eating a meal there). Period. And so far, they're doing a great job of sticking to that rule.

Although rules aren't the end all, be all of everything, I'm grateful that my kiddos are doing their part to keep the crumbs at bay.

July 4

'Twas a relatively quiet Independence Day at the Wight House. Abby and I set out in search of a giant picture frame for our giant family photo that I had printed recently (which we found) and the yearly Old Navy flag shirt (also found), and we enjoyed standard 4th of July fare-- hamburgers and potato salad and strawberries-- for dinner. And then, since it was a hot day, we finished off the meal with red, white, and blue shave ice in the back yard.

Then it was bed time for the boys, hot tub time for Abby, and a socially distanced gathering with the neighbors in the cul de sac (featuring patriotic cupcakes, cookies, and 21+ drinks) for the adults. And then we watched a sprinkling of fireworks in the distance from the observation deck.

Yep. 'Twas a pleasant enough day. And I am grateful for the moments.

July 3

Abby and I took a quick trip to the grocery store this evening to pick up a few items. After snagging some granola bars and strawberries, we scooted through the dairy section and found these.

We quickly agreed that the idea of Starburst-flavored yogurt sounded disgusting so (naturally) we picked up a few cups to try out.

I love this girl of mine and I love how we had the same thought ("sounds gross; let's have some!") at the same time. She's a great sidekick, so I'm grateful.

July 2

Welcome to the latest edition of "COVID sucks so Sherry will share her home decor." Well, that's kind of accurate.

This is the mantle in our living room. Everything on it is connected to Logan, and since it's his birthday month, I took a few extra seconds to pause and really look at it. There's the Lightning McQueen Mickey Mouse ears Heidi gave him. And the garden of I-love-you hands --which were so poignantly apropos since we always exchanged the I love you sign when parted ways-- crafted by his Year to Grow classmates after he died. And a You Are My Sunshine pillow that was serendipitously given to me by the grandma of one of Abby's sweet elementary school friends who was in my care for a short time. And then the bottle of sparkles Logan made as a project.

All beautiful, wonderful reminders of a beautiful, wonderful person. And I'm thankful to have them.

July 1

Isaac had baseball practice today so I adhered to my recent custom and went for a jaunt around the Sports Park after drop-off. For future reference, this is the current face of recreational strolling:

Mask (which I wear more to try to keep my allergies at bay than out of COVID fear) aside, it was a lovely late-afternoon. Blue sky, a light breeze, and a reasonably comfortable temp. Things may not be "normal" or how I'd like them to be right now, but life still has its serene, breathable moments. And this was one of mine.