December 31

I started this blog three years ago tomorrow in an effort to change my perspective following Logan's passing. I felt my faith slipping and growing cold, and I wanted to make a conscious effort to find God in every single day. Somehow, I've done just that for the past three calendar years. And here we are, facing the start of yet another new year.

We finished up our 2015 in simple fashion: we had lunch with my very old and dear friend Gretchen and her family, and then spent the rest of the day packing and organizing and getting ready to head back to the west coast tomorrow morning.

(Clockwise from left... Gretchen and I; the kiddos and I on grandma's porch this afternoon --the first and only quasi-sunny day of our trip!; a great-grandma (age 93)/Brady (age 5) selfie; and our Ledo pizza dinner this evening.)

Once again, I couldn't limit myself to just one photo. I can see a blessing in every single moment; in getting together with a sweet friend I rarely see. In sitting with my own kids in a spot where I once sat as a child, looking out at a scene that's still very much the same but also different in striking ways. In the funny moment that saw a little kid ask to take a selfie with someone who doesn't even use a computer. And in family togetherness. They're all God moments, of course, because if this project of mine has taught me anything at all, it's that God is in absolutely everything, in one way or another. It's merely up to us to see Him there.

So to my friends: happy new year. Blessings to you all for peace, contentment, personal growth, and a God-wink filled 2016.

December 30

Predictably, sadness creeps into my heart as our Maryland trips wind down. They're infrequent and I'm increasingly conscious of how quickly time passes. No matter how long we stay, it never feels like enough and I always head to the airport feeling like I've missed seeing someone or haven't spent enough time with someone else. But we tried to make the best of today --our next to last day here-- by doing some packing and shipping a box home, having lunch at Jerry's one more time, heading to my mom's house to sit with her fiance (who is battling cancer and in need of quite a lot of care) while she ran some errands, and having dinner at my brother's house.

Despite the general busy-ness of today and other days during our trip, I've spent more time than usual thinking of Logan. I mean, I think of him every single day, multiple times a day --I wonder what he's doing, what he'd be doing if he were still with us, if he knows how much we miss him, what he'd think of me interviewing famous people-- but he's on my mind more often during holiday seasons throughout the year. So today, when I turned on Cars for Isaac and Brady at mom's house, this sight made me think of him all the more:

I think those cars with faces (as he called them) will always be synonymous with my Sunshine; my heart and mind will always automatically tie the two together. So whenever I get to see his siblings watching his movie and enjoying that particular tale, I view it as a special gift. And I suspect I always will.

December 29

I've said it before and it continues to be true: I'm not exactly a natural when it comes to relating to women. It's always embarrassing to admit that, but it's true that it's always been a bit easier for me to interact with guys. So our little girls' shopping trip this morning was both a challenge (but in a good sense!) and a blessing to me.

Bright and early (okay, well, cloudy and around 9 AM) this morning my mom, my sister-in-law, Abby, my niece and I hit the road to visit the American Girl store in northern Virginia. We wandered around the store, and then hit a few other shops in the mall before we headed to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch. It was nice to have some time to just sit and talk (and to watch the cousins interact, given how infrequently they see one another). The hours I have with my extended family are so limited that every minute is a blessing.

December 28

Today, we finally took the kiddos to DC. I have to cheat and use multiple pics because there were just so many special moments that I couldn't choose just one.

We drove down --well, Adam drove, since I flatly refuse to drive in or anywhere near DC and Metro tickets are almost offensively expensive-- and found parking rather surprisingly easily in a public lot. From there, we walked. And walked and walked some more. We saw the White House (along with its tight and very obvious security), the Lincoln Memorial, the Washington Monument, the WW2 Memorial (which was actually under construction the last time we were in DC, back when it was just me and Adam), the Martin Luther King, Jr. Memorial, the Air and Space Museum, the Natural History Museum, and, as an added bonus, the National Christmas Tree. And I'm sure I'm leaving something out.

It was blustery, overcast, and just plain cold --and it even rained for a short while-- but I think we had a good time together. Better yet, we made memories, like Brady eating his entire Mighty Kids Meal at the overpriced McDonalds inside the Air and Space Museum and the strangeness of seeing the pink of cherry blossoms in late-December (it has been insanely temperate during our visit, but still -- late December?!) and Abby pausing to read every word of the text printed on the wall inside the Lincoln Memorial and later choosing her favorite Martin Luther King quote at his memorial. And for me personally, there was the flood of memories that washed over me the very second we stepped inside the Natural History Museum. For a few seconds, it was as if I'd been transported back in time to enjoy another elementary school field trip with my friends. Although I never spent a lot of time in DC, I felt very at home and at peace in that moment.

As we headed toward the car, Abby admitted that despite an initial lack of enthusiasm, she'd had fun seeing a slice of what the city has to offer. And I had an amazing time seeing it all over again with my little family. It was a blessing indeed.

December 27

After we took some family photos this morning, we parted ways and around mid-afternoon, our little unit decided to take a hike up to the summit of Sugarloaf Mountain. I discovered rather quickly that the version of me from 20 years ago was probably in better shape than today's iteration, but despite much whining over being so tired by an unnamed party, more than a few topples and spills --coughcough Isaac--, and the unwelcome presence of a lot of rocky stairs, we finally made it through to the top and got to enjoy the pastoral view. (Or at least we got to enjoy it as much as we could, given that about 100 other people had also opted to take advantage of the near-70 degree weather and non-rainy skies to make the trek.)

I left the summit feeling accomplished. But then we wound up going the wrong way on the right path, which led to a significant detour and some degree of freaking out by certain nameless parties. Even though the sun had set and the skies had grown rather dark, we soldiered on through the woods looking for the white rectangles on the trees that assured us we were on the right track. And when I reminded Adam that my night vision isn't exactly snuff-worthy, my sweet Isaac dropped back to hold my hand and walk by my side.

It's not something I think of often, but the Bible is kind of like those white rectangles on the trees. Even when we're wandering in what seems like darkness and the ground beneath our feet could loosen and fall away at any moment, we can look to the Word to guide our path. And we all have our own Isaacs to hold our hands while we walk. Kind of sweet, isn't it? I think so.

December 26

The day after Christmas has historically involved a rather lengthy shopping outing, but this year, I played it quite small. Abby and I went out this morning, but only for an hour or two and only to a single destination. Then we headed back to grandma's, took a rest, and then all of us went over to my brother's house for brunch. (Well, it was brunch if an early-afternoon meal consisting of all breakfast foods qualifies as brunch. I say it does.) My Aunt Barbara, Uncle Frank, cousin Steve, and his daughter Helena made the trip over from the Eastern Shore to join the rest of us, and I think we all had a nice time chatting for a few hours. And of course, there was a helping of silliness, too.

The kiddos love my younger brother Charlie. He has a way with them --probably the "I have no kids of my own so I can rile 'em up and then leave!" way-- and they can't get enough of his brand of uncle-y humor. I can still remember him introducing my kids to the now time-tested concept of the Diaper Fight when Abby, Logan, and Isaac were younger (which, if you're as curious as I'm guessing, involves throwing unused diapers at each other until you either run out or dissolve into giggle fits. It's not even remotely gross).

So yeah, seeing them all have a good time with him and remembering some of our sillier moments as kids ourselves are both blessings to me.

December 25

Merry Christmas! Today proved a busy one indeed. The kids got up this morning at an utterly reasonable (really!) time to raid their stockings and the gifts left under the tree. They were, as it happened, especially delighted with the gifts they'd chosen for one another; Abby practically leapt up to grab Brady after she'd unwrapped his pick for her: a big, stuffed My Little Pony. (She carried it around all day long.)

After we enjoyed some cinnamon rolls (thanks Pillsbury!), we headed up to my Uncle John's house to see some of my aunts, uncles, and cousins, and then we returned to grandma's house for dinner with grandma, mom and her Harvey, both of my brothers, my sister-in-law, my niece, my nephew, and of course, our little fam. We had a lovely time chatting and eating a nice meal put together by my mom and just hanging out.

It was a day filled with family and food, and that's always a blessing. Family may not be perfect all the time and my heart absolutely ached over Logan's absence --I don't cry often these days, but the dam broke this evening for a little while after the day's events had drawn to a close-- it's still a blessing to have them with us.

December 24

I'm a creature of habit and I treasure my traditions, so being away from home for Christmas can knock me off my game a wee bit (though don't get me wrong: I love being back home and sharing my childhood memories in an up-close and personal kind of way). Despite things being done a little differently while we're away, we do all we can to make it fun --and meaningful-- for the kids. Tonight, we hung the stockings by grandma's fireplace and put out a plate of cookies (well, just one cookie) for Santa. Just before the Little Boys went to bed, I showed them Santa's location via the Norad tracker (which amused them). And last but certainly not least, Adam read the Christmas story from Isaac's children's Bible. Right now, the kids are nestled snug in their beds and the grown-ups are watching Adam's favorite holiday faire, It's a Wonderful Life.

So yeah, traditions are an important part of my Christmas experience. But this, when it comes down to the brass tacks, is what matters to me most:

My family. These people --and Lambie, in a representative sense-- are innumerably, immeasurably important to me, and every minute that I get to spend with them is a blessing. So tonight, as I commemorate the birth of Christ and the kids anxiously await a visit from Santa, I feel a deep sense of gratitude that they're all a part of my daily life regardless of where we find ourselves on the map. And I'm doubly thankful for the chance to see so many different relatives tomorrow!

December 23

Today, while Abby enjoyed some one-on-one time with my mom at her house, Adam, the Little Boys, and I went to a local theater to watch the Star Wars movie. I really had no interest in seeing the film, but Adam had been waiting patiently since its release and it was raining out, so it seemed as good a time as any to take the trip.

I sat next to Brady, and as we watched the movie, I gradually became aware of something my little munchkin was doing. Adam held the bag of popcorn and periodically gave Brady a small handful. Every time, before he took a piece for himself, he handed one to me and insisted I take it. He, it seemed, was taking care of me.

A little bit of sweetness goes a long, long way, and a kind-hearted kiddo who shares without any prompting is a blessing.

December 22

Today was a mostly quiet one. We visited with my long-time friend Jen and her youngest child this morning and into the afternoon (thanks again!). The kids had fun in her basement with the foosball table and we had some nice time to chat upstairs, away from the madness. (The wonders of having a basement!) Then we came back to grandma's house, and Adam took off to do some last bits of shopping. While he was gone, I took the kiddos outside to get some much-needed exercise.

Isaac devoted himself fully to the task (as he always does when athletic pursuit is involved), and circled the loop more than 70 times before he decided he was finished. Abby, who'd discovered my stash of original My Little Ponies in the basement, took a break from restoring her treasures to their original glory to join us for a few minutes, and Brady --who's still recovering from his sinus infection-- completed a few laps.

It was a lot of fun for me to watch them, since I can so clearly remember walking around that circle with my grandma and biking around with my brother when I was young. Nostalgic feelings are blessings.

December 21

I think a few years ago, a day like today would've left me feeling frustrated and probably even a little angry. But I suppose I've been blessed with the gift of maturity ;) so I can look back at it all and smile.

When we got up this morning, we'd planned to go to DC to check out the monuments, since the kiddos have never seen them. The forecast features a lot of rain, so though it wasn't the warmest day, we figured it would be a good time to head down.

But it didn't happen. Just as we were getting ready to head out the door, we discovered a bit of a flood in grandma's basement. After wading through a good quarter-inch of water, I told her to call a plumber and tell him it was an emergency. So she did. He came and investigated and said it was the septic tank, so we called he septic tank guy while Adam helped my grandma's boarder clean up the mess as best they could. The Little Boys were fascinated by the septic tank guy when he came; a middle-aged, stocky dude with a baseball cap perched atop his head --like my grandpa used to wear his-- and a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. He jawed on and on at Adam about the importance of proper septic tank management, and barked orders at those of us who observed from the deck above: go flush all of the toilets! All of 'em! I need pressure here! and turn on the water full blast! Do it! All of the faucets!. The greatly amused Little Boys relished their roles as helpers, and happily ran to and fro, turning faucets on and off and flushing toilets every few seconds. I could hardly keep a straight face.

By the time the ordeal was over, it was well after noon and our DC escape was out of the question, so we opted to finish some shopping instead. But before we hit the stores, we went to Chuck E. Cheese to fulfill a birthday promise I made to Brady last week. Since the kids here are still in school this week (poor kids), the place was virtually empty, so they had a blast running around and playing games, and Abby even won a ticket jackpot (which she promptly declared one of the highlights of her life. Aim high, girl of mine. Aim high).

After that, we did our shopping and wound up at The Home Depot to pick up a wet vac for grandma so we could finish cleaning up the mess in the basement. And here, at long last, is my "official" God-moment for the day: as we stood in line, I noticed a man at the register paying, and I realized I knew him: he and his wife were regulars in the Home Arts Building at the county fair --as was I-- when I was growing up. I told the kids to stay with Adam, and got his attention as he headed toward the door. He didn't remember me right away, but figured it out after a few moments, and ushered me out to his car where his wife was waiting.

I had a lovely chat with the Bradys, who are really lovely people. (In fact, I don't think I would've named Brady 'Brady' if they'd been less than great people!) I hadn't seen them in a number of years, but I've kept tabs on them via Facebook. Like us, they know the sting of child-loss: their grandson Mack --who was Abby's age-- passed away unexpectedly a few years ago. As much as I hate sharing membership in that particular club with anyone at all, it's always a blessing to me to run into someone who 'gets it,' so to speak. It's huge for me to be reminded that this life is not the end, and that our babies are living it up on the Other Side.

And to think: if the flood had never happened, we would've gone to DC and I wouldn't have seen them and I wouldn't have gotten to have that reassuring little talk. I've said it many times and it bears repeating yet again: God brings great things out of bad situations.

December 20

Productivity was the name of today's game. After breakfast, we headed out to try to finish up our Christmas shopping. (It was a valiant effort, but we didn't quite achieve the feat.) Then we had pizza and cheesesteaks at Jerry's, which is one of my favorite food places in the DC area (probably in part because they don't exist on the west coast, partly because I have such clear memories of stopping there before dance class some evenings, and partly because, well, mmm good). Then we headed over to mom's house to see her and Harvey. That's where this image is from:

We had a lovely time chatting and watching the trains circle the track beneath the tree (though the steam engine's smoke was a bit much!). The kiddos played with my old collection of Care Bears and Pound Purries (remember Pound Puppies? There was a kitty version, too) and had a grand time moving them around the house. I happened to look up at the tree at one point and noticed how lovely the sky looked. Then I noticed Brady appearing to notice it as well, so I snapped a quick pic of the whole scene.

It's such a blessing to me to see my children playing in the same spaces I once occupied when I was around their age, and to see them soothed by a beautiful sight. Time may fly by, but the sense nostalgia I feel when we're visiting my home is delectably sweet.

December 19

Dorothy Gale said it and it's still true: there's no place like home.

We got up obscenely early this morning, drove to the airport, and flew cross-country so we can spend Christmas with my family. It's what we do every two years. As we did two years ago, we're staying with my grandma.

I spent a lot of time with grandma when I was a kid. I can remember the glee that a very young me felt every time I "helped" her mix her powdered milk and "accidentally" dropped the not-quite-long-enough long-handled spoon into that orange-rimmed dispenser with the pop-up top. And I can remember her racing into my room whenever a firetruck barreled by --sirens blaring-- on the street outside my window. I can remember playing with the stash of make-up testers she left in her bathroom when I was seven or eight and I remember her realizing --after the welts formed-- that I was probably allergic to penicillin when I was eight or nine.

She feels like home to me. And for the ability to see her again and to talk with her in person and to see my kids here in this house where I spent so much time, I'm thankful. So thankful.

December 18

Abby and Isaac had a minimum (also known as 'half') day today and Adam took much of the day off, so we went out for a late lunch this afternoon at the Black Bear Diner.

It was a chill experience; we talked about the new Star Wars movie (in which I have less than no interest) and whether or not it will set records (I voted yes, despite my complete disinterest) and munched our food and just relaxed together.

Sweet family time in action.

December 17

I took the short people to see Santa today.

Thanks to the reservation system, it was a painless experience, and it was fun to see them living out our annual tradition once again. Even better, it took me back to that Christmas five years ago when we all went together as a family. I will never, ever forget how Logan audibly gasped when he rounded the corner and saw Santa; the big guy was a total celebrity in his eyes and he couldn't contain his wonder. I will treasure that memory for as long as I live.

Memories --the new, the old, and the in-between-- are precious.

December 16

Today was a busy day, but also a blessed one. So I'm cheating and using more than one pic, since I didn't feel right about choosing one over the other.

The first image is of Abby and her swimming teacher, Mr. C. Today marked the final day of the quarter, so Mr. C pressed her to go for her medal, which, in short, meant she had to swim 14 laps across the pool and complete a kick turn. Entering the class, she was nervous and wasn't sure she could do it. But she did, and if possible, I think Mr. C was more excited than Abby was when she received that medal. After class ended and she was off taking her shower, I told him that she'd enjoyed her time with him and he, in turn, shared that she'd been his favorite student of the quarter. He even said that they clicked so well that he'd come in for a half-hour block just to teach her. It means so much to me to know that Abby's teachers enjoy having her in class. It's huge, really. But beyond all of that, in the car, as we drove away, she explained that she'd been able to finish her laps because before she started, she prayed and asked God to help her to do. She was convinced that He'd done just that. I'm so thankful that she recognizes and acknowledges her blessings like that! So that's number one.

Photo two is of Brady in his angel costume. Tonight the preschool held their annual Christmas play, Around Back. Brady and his classmates were, of course, angels. I felt a twinge of sadness as I sat there watching him sing; after all, he's my caboose. But it was a gift to see one of my children in that sweet play once again, and for that blessing, I'll always be thankful.

December 15

Quick and easy one today. After Brady and I hit Target this morning to do a little last-minute shopping, we stopped at Starbucks (don't judge me) for a quick coffee (for me. And water --no ice!-- for the short guy). As we sat at our tall table sipping our drinks, Brady suddenly exclaimed 'look, a cross!'

Little children truly are noticeably, wonderfully, outwardly close to God, probably because they haven't yet learned to push Him away. When it comes to my Brady, faith is always on his mind and in his heart. And in turn, because of his childlike enthusiasm, it's often in my mind and in my heart as well.

December 14

Brady turned five today. I know I say "I can't believe" this and "I can't believe" that quite often, but really, I can't believe he's already five years old. Given that Logan, his oldest brother, died at age five, it's an incredibly bittersweet kind of day for me. Bitter that he's not here to celebrate his littlest brother. Sweet that Brady is here and is growing into such a fun, personable, amazing person who reminds me, in many ways, of his biggest brother.

But despite the multiple potential flavors of the day, it was one of celebration, featuring preschool and blue cupcakes and photos and Red Tractor and presents and a cake that was a near-disaster but wound up being really cute.

It was a very good day. Happy birthday, Brady. I love your hugs and your smile and your sometimes startlingly quick wit. My life is better because you're in it.

December 13

Every now and then, I start to wonder how Logan is doing. I guess that sounds a little weird, but it's true. As I was falling asleep last night, I asked --okay, well, begged-- God to tell me about him; to show me that he's all right. And happy. In that moment, nothing happened, so I sadly shut down for the evening and closed my eyes.

Our church service this morning was the Christmas special, of sorts, with candles and carols and the Christmas story. I was paying attention, really. I was, at least in a peripheral way: when we arrived, it was pouring buckets of rain, so truthfully, I was more interested in wringing out my soaked sweater and defogging my glasses than listening.

But suddenly, out of nowhere, the pastor's words grabbed my attention. I can't even tell you the context because I didn't hear it fully, but he said that Jesus gathers up the sheep and holds them close to his heart. And given Logan's love of lambs, he quickly came to mind. And my thoughts immediately returned to last night's plea. A prayer answered.

But that wasn't all; as we went forward to light candles, I had a vision of him sitting with Jesus. His eyes twinkled and he grinned that megawatt smile. And my heart... though it broke a little because him being there meant he wasn't with me... it felt at peace. And these days, that has to be enough.

December 12

The blitz of Christmas-related fun continued today. This morning, Abby and Brady worked on their own gingerbread houses and a little later, Isaac joined them to decorate gingerbread cookies. Then this evening, we headed to Adam's parents' house to celebrate Christmas (and Brady's 5th birthday, which is in two days) with his immediate family. There was a bit of a lull between the birthday celebration and dinner, and most of us sat around talking. At one point, I looked around and realized Abby wasn't in the room, so I went looking for her.

After some wandering, I found her in the living room, gazing at the Christmas tree.

I love the tranquility of this scene. I love the soft glow of the lights on the tree and the little nativity scene in the middle and the pile of gifts and her pensive expression. It encapsulates the wonder of Christmas, I think. And to me, seeing that sweet innocence in the flesh is a blessing.

December 11

Today was a busy one, but it was filled to brimming with good holiday cheer.

In the morning, I was a co-op for the Jesus birthday party at preschool. Cupcakes, chapel, a book exchange, and cute hats. This afternoon, Abby attended her first-ever school dance and then went immediately to her dance class afterward. Then while I took Isaac to a gingerbread house-making party at his good friend T's house in the evening, Adam and Brady shuttled Abby to a youth group dinner.

I love watching my kiddos have fun and embrace some of life's more lighthearted moments. It's a blessing that fills me with a childlike sense of glee, so for days like this one, I'm thankful.

December 10

It's been a busy week, so tonight, it was really nice to just sit in my chair under my blanket while I sipped some mocha-cocoa from a Christmas-y mug and watched a cheesy Christmas movie on the Hallmark Channel.

Those itty bitty moments of respite rock, and they rock even more when I remember to be actively thankful for them. God is, after all, part of every moment, not just the huge, notable ones.

December 9

I didn't catch most of today's sunset, but what I did manage to see as we were leaving swimming lessons was stunning.

A beautiful blend of pinks and oranges and yellows, tempered by dark clouds and streaks of light. It was almost like the entire state of the world --with all of its good and not-so-good elements-- painted right there in the sky. And there was so much beauty despite the darkness. For that lovely light and for the shades of brilliant color, I'm grateful.

December 8

Brady doesn't have preschool on Tuesdays, so we ran some errands this morning. After we'd taken a photo with the fake dog at Old Navy (seriously, the Little Boys love that pup) and selected a book for his class book exchange, the needle on my energy tank was dangerously close to the big E so we skipped (well, he skipped and I walked) across the parking lot for a Starbucks pit stop. As we waited in line, I asked what he wanted for lunch. He looked up at me, smiled his gorgeous grin, and replied "Red Tractor." I started to say no, but something stopped me. Instead, I took his hand, turned around, and walked across the way to Red Tractor.

Why? In that moment, I was struck by a truth that made me a little sad: he's my baby and he'll be in kindergarten next year, so I'm running out of chances to enjoy those spur of the moment, weekday-light kid-lunch dates. So I changed course and said okay, and we sat together and ate in that mostly empty restaurant.

Time is absolutely soaring by at warp speed, and I'm thankful that today, I chose to slow down a little to savor a moment with my muffin.

December 7

As much as I love the glow of colored Christmas lights and singing carols and re-telling the story of Jesus' birth, the holiday season is tinged with pain for me. The ache of Logan's absence isn't something that ever goes away, and though I've grown accustomed to coping with it, the sense of loss strengthens as each year draws to a close. So I admit that I've been feeling sad and disconnected from God lately because it's really, really hard to not be bitter over what happened. But because regardless of how I'm feeling, God is always working behind the scenes, and I got a nice little surprise this afternoon.

When I picked Brady up from preschool, his teacher --who was also Abby, Logan, and Isaac's teacher-- pulled me aside and handed me a bag from Disneyland. She explained that her recent trip to Cars Land made her think of Logan, and that she'd gotten something for us. I opened the bag when I got home, and found this ornament inside. She included a beautiful inscription on the bottom, too.

I'm so thankful that she remembers him and that she chose to honor his memory, and I'm thankful to God for amazing people like her who have worked --and will continue to work-- with my kids.

December 6

For a long while, I was a nailbiter. I stopped cold turkey when I got engaged in 2002, but started up again when we found out Logan was sick. It takes conscious effort for me to keep my fingers out of my mouth, but lately, I've done a decent job of it.

I'm not a particularly glitzy person. In fact, I only bother to put on make-up maybe once a week (if even that frequently). But I do love to paint my nails (when I actually have nails to paint). So tonight, it was a blessing to me --and it made my heart smile-- to put on this happy, sparkly, golden coat of cheer. Believe it or not, the sparkles make me think of light and brightness which make me think of Logan which in turn makes me think of Heaven. And those are very good things.

December 5

After lunch today, Abby asked if we could go to Hobby Lobby to look around, so we did just that. As we wandered around the store, she announced that she wanted to make Brady a pillow for his birthday. She really enjoyed making a Bob the Tomato pillow in home ec last month, and was eager to tackle another project. So she picked some Cars fabric and stuffing, and we headed on home. This evening, she put it together.

Given how frequently she complains about Brady and Isaac, I was surprised that she wanted to make such a sweet gift for one of them. And after she finished it, I checked it out and was impressed with the stitching and with her attitude when she asked, very sincerely, if I thought he would like it.

She may be surly and temperamental at times, but underneath it all, that girl has a good heart, and I'm thankful for the moments when I can clearly see God's continuing work in her life.

December 4

I went to an actual social gathering this evening and had the best time.

It was technically a cookie exchange, but my friend V did an incredible job of putting together an amazing spread of appetizers. And as terrific as the food was, it was really the conversation that made the night. After a few people had left, us stragglers pulled some chairs into a circle and just talked about whatever came to mind. And let me tell you something: when it's 10 PM and you're part of a group of moms, a lot of really, really random subjects arise, from the life expectancy of the standard guinea pig to endless streams of vomit stories. (Sorry V.)

I adore my family, but it was a huge blessing to me to be able to spend time with my friends.

December 3

A light, gentle rain fell from the sky when pick-up time rolled around this afternoon. Brady was pleased as punch to troll the sidewalk with his little umbrella in hand and rain boots on his feet. At one point, he turned to face me and asked me to take a picture of the scene. So I did just that.

He explained that he wanted the picture so he could show Isaac exactly how it looked at that moment.

I love that Brady likes to share experiences with his bigger brother. I love that every single day, he runs to Isaac as soon as he emerges from behind the schoolyard gate and gives him a bear hug. That's God-given, God-ordained brotherly love in action, and I think we need a lot more of it in this world.

December 2

I really like the warm feeling I get from sitting in front of a Christmas tree that's decorated with colored lights.

It's almost like the experience transports me back in time to my younger days; to the anticipation of both Santa's arrival and, of course, the birth of Jesus. For me, there's really nothing quite like that sweet sense of nostalgia and expectation. (And the fact that I can look at my kiddos' homemade photo ornaments on the tree while I look back and remember... a blessing in and of itself.)

December 1

From 6:30 AM onward, today was a busy one, with two interviews, school drop offs, a field trip, an event with the kiddos, and a meeting at church to keep me going (and going). While I waited for Adam to get home this evening so I could jet off to my meeting, the kiddos put on a little nativity play for me, and it was precious.

There were multiple acts and costume changes, and the Little Boys had me in stitches when Isaac the shepherd mused "hmm, one of my sheep is missing. I think it's Tommy."

But beyond all of that, the fact that they wanted to bring the story of Christ's birth to life --and that they did it all on their own-- means so much to me. They know the reason for the season, and that's a blessing of immeasurable worth.