April 13

I ran my "first" 5K this morning. (First is in quotes because although Abby and I took part in the same race last year, the course was too short so it wasn't truly a real 5K.) Although I started off with Abby and her friend Bridget, they quickly ran ahead of me. So I was left all by myself. Sort of.

We had the option to have our race bibs personalized, so I did, with a very simple little message: 'LoveLogan.' (It was what came to mind when I was hurrying to complete early bird registration exactly one minute before the window was set to expire.) So though I jogged alone physically, he was with me. And my thoughts of him and his fight coupled with the grace of God carried me through to the finish line with a --for me-- very respectable time of 36:06.

The fact that I managed to keep chugging without stopping is remarkable to me, especially since I can count on ONE hand the number of days I've jogged since last April. Anyone who knows me in real life knows that I'm not a runner. I have lots of great friends and family members who are bona fide marathoners, but I am not one of them. My knees creak, my hips ache, and it's simply not something that I enjoy very much. But somehow, I finished. I jogged 3.1 miles straight. More than once along the way I addressed both God and Logan, and told them both that I needed a lot of help if I was going to make it... not on my own strength... please, help me...... and He --and in whatever way it's possible, they-- didn't let me down. I made it. And in light of feelings I've had many times over the past two years, it's amazing to not feel the sting of yet another letdown.