Wednesday, August 30, 2017

August 30

I've had a health-related issue for a number of months now, and today I had a procedure to try to identify the root cause.

I was nervous going in, of course, because as a friend recently noted, no one likes the unknown. But I didn't really expect the onslaught of emotion that hit me after I settled into the hospital bed. The beeping, the sounds of machines taking blood pressure, the sight of the IV in my hand and the cool swish of fluid in my vein, the smell: all of it took me back to our days with Logan in the hospital. And it was too much. I had to swallow a rush of tears as one of the nurses prepped me and when she asked if I was scared, I croaked out the truth: my son died in a hospital so being in a hospital is just... hard.

Long tale shorter, the procedure went fine. I still don't really know why I'm having the issues I'm having, but the doctor is confident that nothing nefarious is going on. So today, I'm thankful that I got to leave a hospital setting with decent news in my pocket. And though it hurt --and I'm tearing up all over again just thinking about it-- to remember, it was a good pain because it made my Sunshine feel a little closer than usual.

1 comment:

  1. That must have been really hard! I hope all is ok and nothing serious. I also hope I run into you again at school and get to say a proper hello! Diana

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